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Continue This Totally Ridiculous Story...

And then Haldir the Very Gay Elf nanced right up to that Faramir and gave him a very flamboyant kiss on the lips.

At which point Faramir went off and married a woman to get the prancing elf off his case.

That woman was...
 
Obviously as it had been suspected and there was doubt no one knew for sure because when there is doubt you can't know for sure, but things were hazy... or so hazy. Not as hazy as they were nebulous but not as nebulous as they were redundant. It was a useless, repetitive redundency...
 
And then HobbitGirl raised one eyebrow and traveled by a giant nylon slingshot to that one place where you can change your name. She changed her last name to Barshnozulutz because she was sick of having the most boring last name on the planet or in any of the alternate dimensions.
 
and she was destroyed by a bolt of lightening but got to come back as a beatiful butterfly who spent her time fluttering in one of Haldir's ears and out the other.
 
"This sucks," HobbitGirl muttered to herself. "Haldir is so gay I can't stand it. It makes me want to change my name back to Smith."

And then she turned into a rock.
 
BOb, realizing that the story had strayed from its main character screamed for attention, but then he fell down.
 
The rock that was now a Smith named Hobbit Girl was stuck in the middle of Haldir's brain... that was odd... Bob had to opperate to get her out of their because HG was crying and weeping and pleading to escape. Bob took a crash course in brain surgery.
 
Finally Bob got HG out of Haldir and she thanked Bob heartily. Suddenly HobbitGirl was ravenously hungry so she decided to become a partridge-eating rock. She snagged a partridge out of the air and devoured it, then swelled to the size of a boulder and tumbled down the hill.
 
The Blues Brothers sang... ROLLIN' ROLLIN' ROLLIN' WATCH HOBBIT GIRL A ROLLIN' KEEP HOBBIT GIRL A ROLLIN' RAWHIDE!

Bob danced in sunglasses.
 
Than he ran into the ultimate korean boyfriend who was totally obsessed with this girl...
 
"what girl?" bob asked,
"This broad called Arwen" the korean guy said
"though luck, she's taken" Bob said.
 
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