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Hair Dye, Cloning and General Epic Chaoticness

Welcome to the Chaotic RP of TTF! This is a fun, spontaneous, lighthearted, and most importantly, chaotic RP which is available to anyone who wishes to join. While our primary goal is to have fun, we have a few rules in order to keep some method to the madness.
  • Firstly, each character belongs to their respective TTF user. In other words, you can't write for a character if someone else has claimed that character. If you're new to the thread, please ask the group which characters are available before you claim one.
  • Even though this thread is chaotic and spontaneous, we do have a storyline going. If you're new to the thread, please read the most recent few pages, or more, so you're caught up on what's going on.
  • Make sure to interact with other people's characters. Don't just go off and write your own thing without interacting with anybody.
  • Don't completely ignore or change the storyline.
  • At the same time, please be flexible if someone introduces a new turn of the plot. This is not a carefully planned RP, and it needs to have flexibility for any chaotic new thing someone comes up with (within reason-- it does need to connect to the main story at least loosely).
  • If you are writing for multiple characters, use a script format to indicate which character is speaking. Use asterisks* to denote action. For example:
    • Maitimo: *tries to shake Celeraccoon off his arm* STOP BITING ME, TYELKO!
  • Try to keep spam to a minimum. I would define "spamming" in this thread as writing more than a page over the course of a few hours. (This can be a tough one to follow, I know.) But spamming makes it hard for other people to keep up.
  • At the same time, if you're going to be absent for an extended period of time, we recommend writing your character out temporarily (such as having them disappear or go somewhere) so other people can continue while you're gone.
That's all I can think of for now. If you have any questions or need any help, please feel free to ask!
 
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*Ingwë calls Denver the Balrog Samaritan, asking for a favour*
Denver the Balrog: Go on, man, ask! It's like, we're put on this Earth to be excellent to each other. Or in my case, like, really really far under the Earth, know what I'm saying?
*Ingwë hesitates*
Ingwë: Listen, before I go ahead, old chap, I need to pose you...well, rather a delicate question.
Denver: Shoot.
Ingwë: Alright, then: between chaps, aren't you...you know...evil or whatnot? I hope that's not rude.
Denver: Oh! Right, yeah - naw, totally reasonable question. Actually it's a funny story. See, what happened is, Melkor was going around all the fire spirits, being like, 'hey, who's gonna volunteer to be a balrog,' and I was like, 'it's cool', meaning 'It's cool, thanks, I'm fine as I am'. But the Melk-man thought I meant, 'it's cool,' as in, 'that sounds awesome'. So here I am clothed in the ever-blistering-never-consumed flesh-casement of a Balrog of Morgoth. Kind of a bummer. A lot of my buddies are not chill.
Ilwen: Oh, you poor beast!
Denver: It is what it is. My friend gave me this leaflet, Accepting Eru's Will Even When You Are Objectively Eternally Cursed, it really helped. We laugh about it now.
Ingwë: *to Ilwen* I think I trust him. I'm going to ask.

(OOC: Whew, @Maedhros_Nelyafinwë really threw us a curveball there! Finwë and I had one planned, but we were too slow! Loving the dramatic instinct - in real life, is Maedhros the kind of person who decides 'this party blows' and throws herself on the carpet shouting 'grenade!' , just to see what everyone does? It's late here, but Ingwë will endeavour to get everyone at least a planned way into Angband by the weekend 😂)
 
(Lol! This is not the thread for planning detailed things, FYI. This is a very spontaneous, spur of the moment, do-whatever-you-feel like thread. The only plan I have is that Maitimo and Aranya will get married at some point, but that's it. Things can change rapidly from moment to moment. And IRL, I'm more the type to say, "This party blows and I'd rather be at home drinking chamomile tea and cuddling my cat, so I will politely say my goodbyes and leave even though I might be socially expected to stay longer. 😂)
 
Ashley said:
*After a brief shock from seeing people falling from the sky, Amras hugs his brother and cousin*
Amrod! It's amazing to see you again. I've missed you so much! And Fingon, it's great to see you too.
Click to expand...
Amrod: *squished in the hug* I’ve missed you too, brother! And just so you know, I do not blame you for what happened. I was told it was my “trial by fire,” apparently. But not to worry! I learned healing while in the Halls and got to hang out with Haru Finwë and Grandma Miriel and—

Fingon: *cuts in* —Pityo? Maybe not the time to give your whole story right now?

Amrod: Oh, right. Sorry! I’m just glad to be reunited with my twin again! It’s about time you’ve joined us, Telvo. ☺️

J. Magi said:
*Maglor sends an obnoxious but signature amount of hearts in the group chat, hoping Maitimo hadn't lost his phone already*
Click to expand...
*Fingon sees Laurinalótë’s and Maglor’s messages and decides to add his own:
WE’RE COMING MAITIMO!!! STAY STRONG!*

J. Magi said:
M: We should meet up with Ingwë and his party before we get to Angband.
Click to expand...
Fingon: Wait— Ingwë’s involved now too?? What did I miss while flying around?!?!

Amrod: *helpfully* Tyelko turned up as a raccoon! 😁

Fingon: WHAT?!

J. Magi said:
*He started walking north mindlessly as he mumbled different tactics to himself, forgetting to check if the others were ready*
Click to expand...
Fingon: Umm, Káno? Aren’t you forgetting something? *Holds up an extra large hot glue gun and a giant bag of jingly pom-poms with a mischievous grin.*

Bomb_Tombadil said:
a planned way into Angband by the weekend
Click to expand...
(Ha, Fingon doesn’t need a plan! He just goes ahead and finds a way in later. 🤣)
 
Fingon_Findekáno said:
Fingon: Umm, Káno? Aren’t you forgetting something? *Holds up an extra large hot glue gun and a giant bag of jingly pom-poms with a mischievous grin.*
Click to expand...
*Maglor turned to stare at what he was holding with a very confused expression* How is that meant to help? We probably want to rely on stealth so . . .
 
J. Magi said:
*Maglor turned to stare at what he was holding with a very confused expression* How is that meant to help? We probably want to rely on stealth so . . .
Click to expand...
Hehehe, these are for Sauron. The last time he dared to visit here, I decorated him in dozens of pom-poms and dressed him like a Mettarë (Christmas) Elf, much to his annoyance. I’ll still be stealthy about it, but if he or Morgoth have harmed Maitimo, Aranya, or Uncle Fëanor in any way, they’re about to find themselves veeeerrrrry jingly. *Shakes the bag of jingly poms, which creates a loud, tinkling sound.*
 
*Meanwhile, at Denny's...*

*Maitimo and Aranya had initially walked in to find a bunch of the employees wrestling with Fëanor.*

Maitimo: *thinking his dad was being mean to retail employees for no reason* Oh, no. Was he bothering you guys? I'm sorry on his behalf.

Fëanor: NELYAFINWË! These are agents of Morgoth! Quit gawking and help me!

Maitimo: Okaaaay then! *jumps into the fight and starts wrestling one of the employees*

Aranya: *living vicariously through watching Maitimo fight because she has a sworn oath as a healer to do no harm* FIGHT! FIGHT!

*an employee grabs her and ties her to a chair, and she kicks and screams*

Maitimo: Aranya!! *he runs over to defend her, but turns his back on the fight. One of the employees hits him with a chair and knocks him out. Aranya screams.*

Fëanor: Nelyo!! *fights all the more viciously, but a few more Denny's employees arrive from another location as reinforcements, and they eventually knock him out too. Then they tie up Maitimo and Fëanor alongside Aranya.*

*The speakers turn off the Top 40 radio station and a new tune blasts: "Hey Look, It's Morgoth," the atonal big band hit. Ash confetti descends from the ceiling and Morgoth struts out and strikes a pose.*

Morgoth: Well?! Where's my fanfare? Tough crowd!

Aranya: *blows a piece of ash confetti away from her face* Well first of all, two thirds of your audience here is unconscious. Second of all, I'm tied up and can't clap. Third of all, YOU ARE THE ONE WHO PUT MY FIANCÉ THROUGH NEEDLESS, UNTHINKABLY SADISTIC TORTURE AND I ALWAYS SWORE I WOULD BREAK MY OATH AS A HEALER IF I EVER MET YOU.

Morgoth: Aww, I'm flattered. *elbows Sauron and Thuringwethil, snickering.* (@Tyelkormo the Fair @Fingon_Findekáno )

Morgoth: Well, their loss anyway. They're the ones missing the greatest musical number of all time. Anyway, I have some cooking to do. *disappears into the kitchen*

*As he cooks, Maitimo and Fëanor stir and wake up*

Maitimo: Ow, my head... *sniffs the air* Is that hot sauce?!

Aranya: Yep, unfortunately. Morgoth's making pancakes back there, by the sound of it.

Fëanor: Abominable! Destroyer and corrupter of all good things!

*Maitimo shifts around and manages to grab his phone, and start typing a text.* Atar? I think you can see what I'm typing. How many contacts did I select just now?

Fëanor: ...All of them.

Maitimo: Good. *Starts typing his request for help*

Fëanor: *watches with weird fascination* If I didn't know better, I'd guess you have some practice texting one-handed and behind your back.

Maitimo: Yeah, it's almost like I only have one hand, and sometimes I want to text Aranya without my brothers seeing.

*Morgoth comes out, accompanied by Sauron and Thuringwethil, bearing a platter stacked to the brim with Angband Pancakes™️ and a side of Egg Salad French Toast, all marinaded in hot sauce. All three of the captives gag at the smell. A blank look comes to Maitimo's eyes and his complexion goes decidedly greenish, and he stops typing*

Morgoth: *sees Maitimo's phone behind his back.* Hey! This is supposed to be a COMMUNITY SPACE! No devices allowed! Pretend it's 1994! Talk to each other!

*swipes Maitimo's phone, but Maitimo managed to send the text before it was complete*

*Morgoth watches some of the text responses come in.* Uh-huh. I guess we've got company coming. Mairon, Thuringwethil, who's ready to help me get this place ready for a PAR-TAY???
 
Thuringwethil: Tsk, tsk, Russamól, ignoring your friends. How very rude of you indeed, especially when you have one as pretty and feisty as this one beside you. *Stands beside Aranya and toys with her hair in her clawed fingers.* Think you’re so heroic, don’t you, little one?

Maedhros_Nelyafinwë said:
*Morgoth watches some of the text responses come in.* Uh-huh. I guess we've got company coming. Mairon, Thuringwethil, who's ready to help me get this place ready for a PAR-TAY???
Click to expand...
*Snickers in a screechy sort of way, flapping her wings excitedly.* Oh I LOVE a bad party, my lord! I’ll set up the decorations for our guests.

*Flits about tossing dead bugs and decaying rats about the joint, and hangs up streamers of spider webs for good measure, humming horribly off-key along the way.*

*Tauriel pokes her head out of the kitchen door.* Mr. Gothmore? Dr. Sour? Did I hear there was a party?

*Thuringwethil flies over and shoves her.* Get back to work cooking!!

*Tauriel mutters inside the kitchen.* But I got a raise…

Thuringwethil: I HEARD THAT!
 
*Curufin suddenly makes a very uncomfortable connection*

Wait a minute... unknown Maiar... heat source...

O_O
ಠ_ಠ

*sighs*
I think I may know a shortcut to the 'Denny's kitchen' area in Angband.

*he reluctantly looks back towards the hole he just came out of*
Shouldn't be that hard to find. If the environment keeps getting hotter, and the Maiar trails thicker and closer together, that should be the right direction.

*he walks over to the hole, pauses for a moment at the edge, then takes on a resigned, determined look and clambers back down into it*

*Tancaquárë looks into the hole, and once Curufin is out of the way, she disappears into it as well*

*Curufin wades into the underground stream once more, which is pouring down off a ledge into the blackness below*
Ugh. Not again.
*he sits down on the edge, holds the purple crystal jar to his chest, and pushes off*
*there is a distant splash below, swallowed up once more by the rumbling of the stream*

*Tancaquárë peers anxiously down into the darkness, then follows suit*

*Carried at high speed down the tunnel, worn smooth by the water, Curufin holds out his jar in front of him, looking for any side passages with a greater glow than usual under its light. He spots the passage he entered through and drags his heels on the stone below to slow himself down, but just as he draws level with it, the water level suddenly rises, and the strength of the current sweeps him away. The tunnel narrows to a gurgling hole ahead, and Curufin holds his breath before he is sucked down into it.*

*After what seems like an eternity, Curufin finds himself no longer carried by the current. He opens his eyes, and by the faint light of his crystals, notes he appears to be in a wider expanse of water. He swims upwards, and gasps for breath as he reaches the surface of a small but deep underground lake. He almost immediately screws up his face in disgust.*

Curufin: *coughing at the lungful of stench he has just inhaled* What on earth is that smell?

*Tancaquárë pops up beside him, startling him so that he almost sinks underwater again*
*she looks around and wrinkles her nose*

Tancaquárë: I don't know. But I think we must be close. *she looks down at the water* Many thanks, Ulmo.

*they both swim to the rocky shore*

Curufin: I recognise the feel of this place. I must have passed nearby in my wanderings.

*they stop in front of a wide tunnel, great heat emanating from it*

Curufin: *growing pale* Ugh. I don't think we'll need my crystals anymore. The stench is strongest here. We need only follow our noses.

*he hides the jar away in a pouch on his belt*

*Curufin and Tancaquárë soon emerge in a forsaken storeroom at the back of the kitchen, near to where Maedhros, Fëanor and Aranya are trapped.*
 
Ingwë: Denver, you remember Maedhros?
Denver: Sure, the 'aaaaaaaah' dude! Good set of lungs on him. Covered a solid three octaves, there.
Ingwë: It looks as if you're going to be able to help him after all.
Denver: Awesome, man! You found him?
Ingwë. In a manner of speaking.
Denver: Where?
Ingwë: Angband.
*The line crackles*
Ingwë. Still there, my lad?
Denver: I'm here, I'm here, it's just *sharp breath* ah, Angband - that's just like, super unfortunate for everyone concerned *winces* aah.
Ilwen: Are you quite alright, Mr. Denver?
Denver: Yeah, see what it is, is there's this elemental scourge in the hand of Morgoth - kind of a whip of power, you might say. And if you even think about going against him, it makes you - howl - ah, that was a biggie.
Denver: I'm sorry dudes, I want to help. But I think this one's out of my talons. I - oh no, here comes the big wave. COWABUNGA
*he roars, and for the first time sounds like a true demon*
Ilwen: *to Ingwë* Listen to him. This is unbearable - we have to find another way.
Ingwë: *to Ilwen* There is no other way. It's Angband.
Ingwë: *to Denver, whose breathing is laboured* Listen, Denver. When I first woke up under the stars, I was king, and there was only darkness. A darkness we hadn't yet learned to fear. Hundreds of little ones wandered off, thinking the world was only full of cool grass and night flowers, and I didn't know to stop them. They never came back. I wasn't there for them.
At last, we survivors made it to the Blessed Realm.. And though I'd lost so many of those who trusted me, for some reason, I still bore the burden of kingship, so I went up the holy mountain to commune with Manwë, king of kings. I went into a long trance, thinking I would find healing for my failures. I came out to find the Two Trees ruined, our people blackened in body and in heart, crimes worse than death. I wasn't there for them.
Now, I am king still, though my sword brings safety to none, my name hope to none. And one of my little ones is lost. If I'm not there this time...
Denver: *whimpering*Sorry...so sorry...I'm trying to listen...
Ingwë: You Samaritans are there to help people who don't know anymore why they exist, right? Well, I'm about to be one of them. So help me. And here's what I swear to you, and my kingship is good for a promise, if nothing else: if you get us into Angband - I'll get you that whip. What do you say?
*long pause, then line disconnects*
Ingwë: Well, there it is. *sighs deeply* That's what cruelty does to good people
*ping*
Ilwen: What's that?
Handmaiden: He sent you a location.
 
Maglor *in full seriousness*: That's brilliant Fingon.
M: Wait! What did I say about . . .
staying . . . .
. . . together . . .
*By then, they were long gone*

Oh dear . . .
*He knelt by the hole in the ground and grimaced. It was a nasty, dirty, wet hole, filled with the ends of worms and an oozy smell. He hated to be overly prissy, but it was things like this that reminded him why all of his hobbies included staying inside, clean and warm.*
If we're all going to follow Curvo, then someone should tell Ingwë we won't meet up with his party. Or maybe we should send someone? But splitting up is never a good idea . . .
*Maglor was really just stalling, at that point*
 
Maedhros_Nelyafinwë said:
*Everyone's phone pings, even Finwë's and Ingwë's. It's a mass text from Maitimo.*

Help! Denny's is a front for Angb

*the text ends there*
Click to expand...
*Mairon takes the phone from Morgoth, glaring daggers at him once he realized the text has been sent*
My Lord, how can you? Haven't I explained to you already how to use this? You were supposed to not let him send it.

*Internally, he wishes that Celeraccoon Jones haven't gotten the message and come to save the day*

*Looks at their captives*
Now now, don't be so hasty to leave. I've been slaving away all day just so you guys can enjoy the feast I readied for you.

What actually happened earlier:



Mairon: I hate my life.
(I just realized I forgot to erase those lines from tracing it earlier but I'm too lazy to redo it. Sorry.😬)
 
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Maedhros_Nelyafinwë said:
*Meanwhile, at Denny's...*
Click to expand...
*Laurinalótë leans down and whispers in Maitimo's ear.* I'll look for an escape route. *Leaves one of herself behind his ear for soothing effects as she sneaks around the Denny's. She visits the kitchens and is greeted with her first look at hot sauce pancakes. A red-haired Elleth is grumbling over the pan. Laurinalótë sneakily sprinkles some of her golden dust over the pan when her back is turned, distracted by Thuringwethil. The hot sauce pancakes begin floating in the air, and Laurinalótë ponders how she can taste the concoction. She floats out of the kitchen with the pancakes and hides on a high window. Now she can see everything. But first, the pancakes...*

Server Room Gremlin said:
*Curufin and Tancaquárë soon emerge in a forsaken storeroom at the back of the kitchen, near to where Maedhros, Fëanor and Aranya are trapped.*
Click to expand...
*Meanwhile, other progress is being made. Laurinalótë whispers in Curufin's ear.* I can sense myself nearby... We must be close. *Sniffs the air with her petal centers.* I smell something burning...
 
*Meanwhile, with Celeraccoon Jones*

*Gasp of shock*
My brother is in danger, everyone! We should leave!
Lindiel: they've all left while you were napping.
Celeraccoon Jones: oh... have they? Matters not, anyways! Celeraccoon is here and he's ready to save the day! Come on, my sidekic--
*Lindiel glares at him*
Uh- I meant the love of my life! Le's go!

*He takes a shortcut to his secret facility and emerges, all geared up. He flashes some fake natural light from projectors*

It's dawn now. We ride at dawn!
*Jumps in Lindiel's arms*
Come on, babe!
 
*Handmaiden forwards Denver's location to @Finwë and Maglor @J. Magi*

Ingwë calls once more upon his ancient horn. The Eagles of Manwë, long schooled in his friendship, swoop down the dark hills, offering their backs for the party to ride.

Then, for the first time since the very Beginning, Ingwë and Ilwen, high monarchs of the Vanyar and Elfinesse, pass out through the silent saddles of the Pelóri and over the wine-dark sea. With each mile they travel from Valinor, the wind blows colder.
They soar unseen over the swaying ship-lights and havens of Númenor, then glide lower and lower to the ocean's surface - for a moment it seems as if the eagles are failing from long fatigue, about to fall into the sea.

But then, amids the gloom, they spot a mere speck, a rocky island - the top of an ancient mountain, in the waters above where Angband used to stand. They alight on the meagre beach, stained with seaweed and the timeless absence of mortal touch. A cave mouth yawns above.

Handmaiden: This is the place.
Ingwë: The king has come at last, to redeem his lost chidren.
Handmaiden: *flintily* And Handmaiden is come, to redeem her Denny's card.

The cave swallows them up.
Inside, all is black, but - as their eyes adjust - streaked red with veins of fire.
Footsteps - more than footsteps: beats like the tumbling of an awful drum - shake the ground, and groans as of a bull slain on the altar.
It is Denver. He is vaster than Ingwë imagined: imprisoned in his own vastness, like an elephant that cannot bend to touch its calf. His skin writhes with flame; his mere breathing is a roar.

His tail flicks out in front of him, and whips the ground. The party jump back. He whips again and again, and they see his is drawing some kind of circle, some kind of runes.
The party hold close to the walls. How much is a good man capable of, when you trap him in a body - a body addicted to drugs, addicted to drink? What is a Balrog's flesh addicted to?

Denver steps back from his occult drawings.

Denver: You are misled, small beings, if you think there is a way into Angband.
 
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*Fingon peeks down the dark hole over Maglor’s shoulder, and makes a moment’s decision.* Ambarussa! You two make sure Haru Finwë knows to tell Ingwë we’re splitting off to follow a trail. Keep him safe. Káno and I are going to follow Curvo.

*Ignoring Maglor’s protests, knowing he sometimes needs a little ‘push’ to do something, Fingon shoves him off the edge into the hole, then jumps in after.*


In Denny’s…

*Thuringwethil sneaks a pancake off the top of the stack and starts waving it in front of the prisoners’ faces, letting the hot sauce drip.* MmMmm, yummy yummy! Don’t you want a bite, Russamól? I know they’re your favorite! Or maybe you’d like to share with your father and friend here! *Waves it closer to them for a long moment, then pulls back and screech-snickers in amusement as she eats it.*

Glorfindel Goldtress said:
The hot sauce pancakes begin floating in the air
Click to expand...
*In the kitchen, Tauriel returns to the griddle and freezes when she sees it empty.* Wait- where did all my pancakes go?!

*They’re all floating above her…*
 
*Ilwen steps forward with brave but quavering voice. Denver lashes himself, unconsciously, with fiery tail*
Ilwen: What do you mean, Denver? No way into Angband?
Denver: There is no way, lady. No door. No gate. No crack or fissure or passage. Morgoth's kingdom don't leak, know what I mean?
Ilwen: Have you lied to my husband, then?
Denver: You remember what I said before? About being a fire spirit? And then, being trapped in the flesh of a balrog?
Ingwë: *evenly, stepping in front of Ilwen* Yes, Denver. I do.
Denver: Well. One moment, I was a spirit in the timeless halls. Then, I was in the pit where balrogs are birthed. The deep, deep pit. Of wailing and of flames.
Ingwë: You mean-
Denver: That's how you get in. That's the only secret I've got for you, guys. I'm sorry it's not better.
Ilwen: Become a balrog?
*Denver shrugs*
Denver: Yeah, well. I don't expect you to go through with it. Don't expect much from anyone, if I'm honest. The centuries go easier, that way. But after everything you said, king dude...thought I'd at least show you. I'll leave you guys to think.
*he begins to stomp away, wearily*
*Ingwë stares a long time at the rune circle, as if staring beyond the world into the Starless Void.*
Ingwë: *gritting his teeth* As I have said, so shall I do. Is the oath of the Vanyar, less than that of the Noldor?
*Ingwë steps forward, but someone throws an arm across him.*
Handmaiden: Hey, Denver. Just one question. Tell me: if someone becomes a balrog, do they keep all the Angband loyalty points they had as an elf?
Denver: I mean, I never heard of a rule against it-
Handmaiden: Well then COWABUNGA ANGBAND!!
*she leaps into the runes. A flash of fire. She disappears.*
Ingwë: *to Ilwen* Remind me to check we're paying into her pension fund.
 
M: Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo not the diiirt

*I assume they follow the same route as Curufin, coming out at the same spot*
 
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