Satellite TV at the Prancing Pony?

[Barliman Butterbur]

TV or not TV, that is the question! I have, through private sources of my own, come across a method of bringing in satellite TV from the Outside World to the Prancing Pony. This has started a firestorm in Bree, and both the Big and Little Folk are saying “Bring it in and let’s ‘go modern,’” and others are saying “Are you mad???!! Keep the outside world out of here!”

I need more opinions before I make a decision. What say you?

C&B,

Barley

 

[joxy]

What say you?

Is it HD TV?

 

[Barliman Butterbur]

Is it HD TV?

Of course! (See jpeg)

Barley

 

[Arvedui]

Well, King Elessar issued an edict that no Men could enter the Shire, but I am not sure if Bree is included in the Shire. If it is,then I guess you have your answer...

 

[Barliman Butterbur]

Well, King Elessar issued an edict that no Men could enter the Shire, but I am not sure if Bree is included in the Shire. If it is,then I guess you have your answer...

Bree is outside the Shire beyond the High Hay.

Barley

 

[Arvedui]

Then you should be okay, legally.
But I am worried about bringing sattelite TV into the northern parts of Middle-earth. It was my kingdom once, you know. And I am afraid of what sort of programs innocent hobbits might come to see. Especially programs made by the wild men in the south.

 

[Barliman Butterbur]

...I am worried about bringing sattelite TV into the northern parts of Middle-earth. It was my kingdom once, you know. And I am afraid of what sort of programs innocent hobbits might come to see. Especially programs made by the wild men in the south.

Your worries are quite well-founded! But you misunderstand: no one in Middle-earth (to say nothing of the wild men in the south) have the technology to produce their own TV programs. The stuff that comes in would come strictly from the Outside World.

But I'm keeping track of everyone's opinions. Please respond to the poll! (I'm surprised that there has been so little response to this — frankly, I expected a firestorm.)

C&B,

Barley

 

[joxy]

Of course! (See jpeg)

Let's compare sizes!
1525a.jpg

 

[Barliman Butterbur]

Let's compare sizes!
1520a.jpg

It's hard to tell what you have — ours here is a 34" (just shy of a meter) diagonal, and it looks like you have the same thing.

Barley

 

[Barliman Butterbur]

Just found this:

"Television's perfect. You turn a few knobs, a few of those mechanical
adjustments at which the higher apes are so proficient, and lean back and
drain your mind of all thought. And there you are watching the bubbles in
the primeval ooze. You don't have to concentrate. You don't have to react.
You don't have to remember. You don't miss your brain because you don't
need it. Your heart and liver and lungs continue to function normally.
Apart from that, all is peace and quiet. You are in the man's nirvana. And
if some poor nasty minded person comes along and says you look like a fly
on a can of garbage, pay him no mind. He probably hasn't got the price of a
television set." —Raymond Thornton Chandler, writer (1888-1959)

Barley

 

[Barliman Butterbur]

What I'm worried about is this private source! This sounds like some evil Saruman left behind. Maybe a Palantir type thing is involved in the broadcasting, but who built that TV?! And where are the little people who in favour of this? I'll set them straight. It's those crazy Breelanders I tell you! Bring in this TV and I'm going back to the Shire were people aren't so odd, and they don't take any widgets more sophisticated than a loom.

Well, as long as it's YOU, I'll tell you, but keep it under your hat! We found a kind of dimensional tunnel in our beer cellar! Came across it quite by accident. Something like a spatial wormhole, but it looks like a tunnel that starts in the Pony's cellar and comes out in a place called "Joisey" I think it is. We've had some of the Bree Big Folk doing commerce with some of the TV industries there.

And don't forget, unless you're a hobbit, you can't get into the Shire any more, by royal edict! Anyway, take the poll so we can get some more statistics on this.

Barley