There's a new trailer, but the whole thing won't be released generally until July 14.
I know, you've been waiting a long time for a new rant from me. Now here it is. 😁
I have now seen two different new teasers, but one of them seems to have been deleted already. Both last about a minute.
I don't know if you can still watch both on Amazon Prime, because I already cancelled my Prime subscription due to the desecration of "Wheel of Time".
One shows all kinds of people gawking at Meteor Man, who is just about to land. And that pseudo
hobbit with the awkward wig says, "The shkieeees are sssshhhhtraaaange!!!" 🤡
In the other, you see a few more nice looking snippets of
Numenor and a couple of
Elven cities in between confused action scenes. One of the Elven cities looks architecturally very similar to Peter Jackson's
Rivendell, which I already found too cheesy at the time, especially since it also has nothing to do with
Tolkien's own drawing. Still, the
cities in this teaser are a small ray of hope. (We probably have John Howe to thank for that. So at least you can get some nice screenshots out of it as Tolkien inspired art.)
Overall, both trailers don't seem very Tolkien-esque to me, except for some of the landscapes and the cities. There is no
Middle-earth atmosphere, it just looks like modern, at most diverse, woke, generic standard US/Hollywood fantasy, designed solely for modern, young US consumers. That might be okay in principle, if they did not a) want to make money with
the Lord of the Rings label and b) would stick more to the lore. But the arrogant producers believe they know better than
the master. “Can we come up with the novel Tolkien never wrote and do it as the mega-event series that could only happen now?” Well, you can try, but it will be very embarrassing. Just make your own crappy fantasy story instead of desecrating an existing work! As it seems, at least 75% of everything is fictitious anyway and has nothing to do with Tolkien's original. So you actually think Tolkien sucks, but at the same time you want to make money with his name. Pathetic.
And of course, as I already predicted, Tar-Miriel is PoC-Miriel. This shows once more, as with the other
peoples, that the optical appearance and origin of the protagonists is not explained Middle-earth immanent meaningfully but is taken solely on the basis of politically motivated quota rules, which makes sense in modern stories set in big metropolises with a lot of multiculturalism, but not in historical or mythological stories where the book template is very clear. There is also diversity, but the individual peoples themselves are 99% non-diverse but of homogeneous descent. And that's what makes it so interesting in real fantasy or in historical stories, when someone travels to other countries and gets to know new peoples, customs, cultures, etc., instead of everything just being randomly mixed everywhere.
And when someone says they can't empathize with people who have a different skin color than themselves in a movie, that's total insanity. For example, Lenny Henry says, "If you can't see it, you can't be it." What nonsense. Then, for example, no white people would have been able to watch "I Am Legend" with Will Smith. What a ridiculous idea.
This way of thinking would be true fixation on skin color (or even worse), while here we value Middle-earth being logically comprehensible, coherent and true to the book. I hope that one of those goofy movie producers / showrunners is reading along here, but of course they're way too aloof to bother with a Tolkien forum.
"Miriel, the only daughter of Tar-Palantir, was a woman of great beauty, smaller than most of the women of that land, with bright eyes." (...) “And the last, an emerald-green, cold, billowing wave crowned with foam, surging over the earth, accepted into its bosom its queen Tar-Miriel - the one who was a fair of pearls, more fairer than silver and ivory. Too late she tried to climb the steep path of Meneltarma to the sanctuary; the waves swept over her, and her cry was drowned in the roar of the wind."
So the two teasers are exactly as expected, confirming once again what one could already interpret out before. So really nothing fundamentally new. And that's probably how it will be in a week, too.
Although the show will of course be maximum crap, it's still fun to speculate:
Who do you think the meteor man will be?
1)
Gandalf
2)
Sauron/
Annatar
3)
Tom Bombadil
4) a Blue Wizard
5) an "Amazon original"
6)
Celeborn
7) just a sign that the
dragons in "Game of Thrones" have awakened again
Where is Celeborn?
1) He's on a secret mission in
the east.
2) He's the meteor man.
3) He has not yet been born.
4) He's dead.
5) He's doing a hundred year sabattical right now.
6)
Galadriel has divorced him and he is completely occupied with raising
Celebrian, while Galadriel takes care of world politics.
7) Who is Celeborn?
How can
Durin III and Durin IV exist in parallel?
1) An error in the matrix.
2) Durin IV is in truth not Durin IV but a disguised Celeborn.
3) Only
Aule can explain this.
How many
orcs will Galardiel kill?
1) At least a thousand
2) at least a hundred thousand
3) at least a billion
4) in any case more than all
men together, because she's an independent, strong, female girlpower-elf
Why do the
hobbits wear salad and herbs in their hair?
1) Because it looks cool.
2) Because it looks idiotic.
3) It's for camouflage.
4) Because it's the original version of pipeweed and they get high from its smell.
5) What is this question, let's rather dance and sing while wearing a strange dress made of straw.
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