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Is it better to be quiet, than to act on insults?

herlig9

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Feb 8, 2021
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For awhile. I never quite understood what Jesus meant when he said "Bless those who curse you"?
Or its more. How it would look like in practice

But i think i understand now.

I think the part it becomes difficult is in politics, because quarreling can lead to insults often. And in politics, lets face it. This is very often the case. But then i remember Matrix Resurrections movie line, where it said
“Feelings are easier to control than facts”.

So i think to myself. I have to keep in mind the clouded emotional harm aren't actual facts. But treat them the way i would like to be treated, as a human, so even if they do insult, cause me mental harm, i have to think. How would i like to be treated in that moment? What if i was talking to myself?
As i would like to be treated?

But just curious to what you think?

"Love your neighbor as yourself"
 
"Bless those who curse you" is so hard to do.
In the moment, I feel attacked and try to defend myself. I wish I was better at trying to understand why the other person is saying such things. I think that would help me respond with kindness.
It does allow for self defense however. Even Jesus told his disciples to sell their belongings for swords. But how one responds, i guess this is where the true challenge lies in :)

But i am sorry if you have been mistreated or done harm in anyway.

"Bless those who curse you" is so hard to do.
In the moment, I feel attacked and try to defend myself. I wish I was better at trying to understand why the other person is saying such things. I think that would help me respond with kindness.
Or alternatively. Maybe it means to avoid being provoked?
Like you wouldnt respond an evil for an evil. And rather respond with goodness in a sense?
 
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As much as Tree wants to avoid engaging given a lack of time this particular subject is an incredibly deep one on which a great deal of time, ink and pondering can be spent by all.

What is an "insult" ? Definition: "speak to or treat with disrespect or scornful abuse."

Note the flow. The insult flows FROM someone TOWARD another. The insult therefore reflects the opinion or PERSPECTIVE of the sender.

To be honest, an insult is an OPPORTUNITY - not a detriment. It allows us to check up on ourselves.

WHY does that person hold that opinion or, worse, perspective of me? Is there any truth to the matter? Do I need to change something? Am I presenting myself badly (either in the immediate situation, or in an ongoing way?)

Frankly, the SENDER is merely speaking words. And words only have the power the recever gives them.
They also only have the BENEFIT the receiver chooses to allot them.

Are we offended by the 'insult' ? if so, why? The "offense" is "MY" problem, not the sender's problem. The offense exposes a vast array of things. Pride, if I'm flustered because "my self" has been 'attacked'. Guilt, if I'm flustered because the 'insult' actually strikes close to home, and exposes something about me I need to deal with. Etc.

This should be pondered very deeply.

It is true we should never behave in an 'insulting' way toward another. It is harmful to them, though it need not be when they recognize the VALUE of the insult... yet we should avoid harm.

It is worth pondering into the bargain here, one of the closest rebukes Jesus came, to levying an insult:
"“Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for ye are like unto whited sepulchres, which indeed appear beautiful outward, but are within full of dead men's bones, and of all uncleanness.”

What was he saying to them? A sepulchre is of course a small vault or place for burial of the dead. A whitewashed sepulchre is one that is made to "look good and impressive on the outside, but inside is full of decay and impurity.'

Jesus' "insult" was providing them the OPPORTUNITY to "look into a mirror" and see themselves for who they really are. Would they? What they did with the truth He spoke to them, was not his responsibility. His responsibility was to speak the truth.. and he tried every means possible to get His point across.

Now... his motive in levying the rebuke/insult was, of course, entirely different than most people's "insults" - nonetheless, he was showing us:
1. The proper use of insults. (when one is indeed distributing death, as the scribes and Pharisees were, an 'insult' is not necessarily out of place - it is a valid way to bring to their attention what they are doing.)
2. The responsibility of the deliverer. (To use all available means to get the attention of a true evildower.)
3. The responsibility of the hearer. (To receive, judge, and change if/as needed.)

And more.

So at the end of the day, @herlig9, the question is "What do you mean by ...'act on insult' ?"
There are some "actions" when an insult arrives, that are essential. They are all inward.
There are other "actions" when an insult arrives, that are detrimental. They are all "outward."

An insult is an expression of a "judgment". The insultor is simply expressing their judgment. It is "we" who receive, who then either apply the insult according to its value, or behave "wrongly", and go on the attack, feeling ourselves of greater worth than perhaps we actually have.

Next time we are 'insulted' Tree suggests we disarm the insulter.
Something on the order of "thank you for pointing that out. I will give it some deep thought and make any changes needing to be made."

Oh what a wonderful subject is this one.
 
Tree decides to shorten his ramblings - (gasp..!!!) - and address the precise question @herlig9 asked.

Q. "Is it better to be quiet than to act on insults?"
A. It depeids on the "action."

The insult, seen positively as an opportunity, would have a multitude of positive actions able to be taken.
The insult, seen negatviely as an 'assault' in any way, would have a multitude of negative actions able to be taken.

Use of the term 'act on insults' vs. 'react to insults' is key. Action always indicates the probablity of engagement of perspective rather than opinion. 'reaction' always points to the engagement of opinion rather than perspective.

There is great hope in action. - but little hope in reaction.
 
To the second part of @herlig's question, seen in the 'shout box,'

Q. Are there times when we must address it?
A. Must begin with a question:
---SubQ:1 From whose perspective and/or worldview? Humanist, or spiritual? Which humanist or which spiritual?
---SubQ2: In what setting? General or business? Public or private? At a party or in a prayer meeting? (or a myriad of other possibilities)

Tree is only qualified to speak from Biblical Theology on this - (and even then, only barely qualified) - and it is not wise to do so publicly, so there we have it.
 
@herlig9, in response to "is it better to be quiet than to act on insults":
(From the starting point of someone born again in Christ, of course.)
First, in the position of the one insulted, we have to give up any selfish emotional baggage to God. This is important: we need to give up any resentment/‘selfish ambitions’/etc... to God and let His love fill us; ‘Quieting down over time’ can mean storing it away and it may be building up and blocking God’s love. Thinking and dwelling on these selfish emotions is essentially a sin if we do not give them to God. Second, I would say in any situation whether we act or ‘be quiet’, we should love the person. But when you find you cannot love a person, it is only natural: but a Christian can let God's love flow through them and fill them to love others (given you let the emotional stuff go). Third, (of course it depends on the situation/person/what God puts on your heart) we may act by 1)Praying or 2)Act on it by doing good in return for evil - which can mean showing them where they went wrong.
As @Starbrow pointed out, it is very hard to 'bless those who curse you' but think about it... it isn't nearly so hard when God's agape love is doing so rather than just our finite human love.
What do you think?
 
One can summarize the 'fundamental' difference between the humanist and religions response as this:
Humanist: "Do unto others as they do unto you."
Religions: "Do unto others as you want them to do unto you."

It is of course far deeper than this - and @Erurávennë lays the biblical theological foundation of it above, well.

Ent just wants to recommend caution, as this subject can easily spill over into controversy. Remember the Rule about Religious and Political Discussion on the Forum.

If we were to relate the discussion to "How Tolkien likely thought about the issue" we could well discuss Tolkien's LIKELY posture - which we could speculate would match the above post.

Thank you.
 
Humanist: "Do unto others as they do unto you."
My good-natured response (delivered with a smile): Now I feel like I've been insulted.
The American Humanist Association has its "The Ten Commitments". I don't see this "an eye for an eye" ;) philosophy anywhere in the list. However, "Empathy" is one of the Ten which may apply here. Anyway, just a little food for thought; it's probably against the rules to continue much down this line, as you've already cautioned.

If we were to relate the discussion to "How Tolkien likely thought about the issue" we could well discuss Tolkien's LIKELY posture
I think Tolkien demonstrates the subject principle most-directly in how our hobbit-heroes treat the defeated Saruman along their homeward journey. He insults them and attacks them. They return kindness and (more or less) forgiveness.
 
I was rewatching "McGee and Me". Altough i think its flawed Christian series because.. the cartoon skits is obviously aimed to kids. But its also a distraction from the drama + scriptural message. The latter kinda works which is why i remembered this part after all these years.
15:16 - 24:26


But the keyword "Love never lies". Can kinda be emphasis on our relationship with God and our fellow man. The only problem is if selfish ambitions gets in the way, and we might end up hurting others because that strong desire gets in the way of our relationship with the Lord.
 

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