🎲 Lord of the Pants

[Wonko The Sane]

I really am moving to England, Thôl! So if you want you can come and live in my house!
My bed doesn't have a mattress on it at the moment as it is on the floor of my sister's room and covered in giggling 15 year old girls, but you can sleep on my boxspring in my sleeping bag.
I won't be needing it in England.

 

[Wolfshead]

Originally posted by Wonko The Sane
CraigSmith must be British.
Only the British call "math" "maths"

Yes, I would happen to be British. You see, in the location bit, it says Scotland

Why say Math? It sounds stupid, Maths sounds much better... Stupid Americans

Ok, so to stay on-topic, here's another one

Elrond: You cannot wear pants, none of us can

 

[Ancalagon]

Originally posted by CraigSmith
Yes, I would happen to be British. You see, in the location bit, it says Scotland

So you mean you are Scottish?

 

[Wonko The Sane]

Originally posted by CraigSmith
Yes, I would happen to be British. You see, in the location bit, it says Scotland

Why say Math? It sounds stupid, Maths sounds much better... Stupid Americans

Ok, so to stay on-topic, here's another one

Elrond: You cannot wear pants, none of us can

Noo! Maths sounds SOOOO bad!! Why do you need to pluralize it?! Makes NOOO sense!!!

Lord of the Pants:

I just found a quote supporting my belief that pantsing Yrch is a Tolkien phenomenon!!!

Gorbag to Shagrat: "You may well put your pants on, if you have them! It's no laughing matter!"
From "The Choices of Master Samwise"

AND

Shagrat to Snaga: "That's enough from you,' snarled Shagrat. 'I had my orders. It was Gorbag started it, trying to pull off those pretty pants!"

From "The Tower of Cirith Ungol"

 

[Wolfshead]

So you mean you are Scottish?

Well, yes... and no. You see, I'm 3/4 Scottish and 1/4 English. But Scotland is part of Britain, hence my being British also. Of course, you already knew that, I would hope.

Noo! Maths sounds SOOOO bad!! Why do you need to pluralize it?! Makes NOOO sense!!!

Why did we need to pluralise it? Why did you need to singularise it? I mean, it must have been Maths before Math. And when you think on it logically (as I hope I'm doing), Maths makes more sense.

There are many things within Mathematics; Calculus, Trig et al. The term maths probably is derived from Mathematics. There being lots of things within it, so, make it plural. Or, the original is plural, so why not make the abbreviation plural?

Anyway, more Lord Of The Pants... um.

Treebeard on Gandalf: The only Wizard who really cared about pants.

Quite a lame one though, methinks.

 

[Wonko The Sane]

No no no no no!!
You can't pluralize an abbreviation!!! It's just plain wrong!

Math is closer to Math. for Mathematics than anything else.
Therefore it makes SOO much more sense than Maths. You can't abbreviate something by taking the first four letters AND the last letter!!

More Lord of the Pants!

"There are pants in the wild,' said Strider; "tweed, and khaki, and Dockers; and I have some skills as a pantser at need. You need not be afraid of freezing before winter comes. But sewing and wearing pants is long and weary work, and we need thread. So tighten your belts, and think with hope of the tailors at Elrond's house!"

(Worth it to find the original quote just to see how it compares. In my book it's page 186 but I have a compilation of all three in one binding. It's in the chapter called "A Knife in the Dark" in FotR.)

 

[Wolfshead]

I was about to go and look up some more pluralised abbreviations, but then I realised that would be rather sad. So I won't. What I will do is stop the whole English-English-being-better-than-American-English argument and get back on topic

More Lord Of The Pants -

West of the Anduin as far as the Misty Mountains and the Gap of Rohan shall be tributary to Mordor, and men there shall wear no pants, but shall have leave to wash their own socks.

Taken from the bit when The Mouth Of Sauron is giving the terms to Gandalf.

Oh, and Maths does sound better

 

[Wonko The Sane]

Does not! Math! Go Math!!

Lord of the Pants:

"Then suddenly Faramir looked at Pippin. 'But now we come to strange matters,' he said. 'For this is not the first pantsless halfling that I have seen walking out of northern legends and into the Southlands.'"

 

[Glamdring]

What a brilliant topic. (no sarcasm....seriously)
This is the funniest thing I've read since........damn, always have to work myself into a hole

 

[Arvedui]

From Treebeard:
'Almost felt you liked the Pants! That's good! That's uncommonly kind of you,' said a strange voice. 'Turn round and let me have a look at your pants. I almost feel that I dislike them both, but do not let us be hasty. Turn around!'
A large knob-knuckeled hand was laid on each of their belts, and they were twisted round, gently but irresistibly; then two great stockings lifted them up.

'For I am not going to show you my pants, not yet at any rate.'
'For one thing it would take a long while: My pants are growing all the time, and I've lived a very long, long time: so my pants are like a story. Real pants tell you the story of the things they belong to in my language, but it takes a long time to say anything in it, because we do not say anything in it, unless it is worth taking a long time to say, and to put on.

I was thinking about mentioning Boromir breaking the Wind of Gondor, but thought it was slightly off topic....

 

[Wonko The Sane]

Gollum:

"Where iss they, where iss they: my Pantssess, my Pantssess? They're ours, they are, and we wants them! The theives, the theives, the filthy little theives. Where are they with my Pantssess?! Curse them! We hate them!!!"

 

[Froggum]

I hope no one has posted this....


"Where now the belt and the buckle?
Where are the pants that need sewing?
Where is the fly and the zipper,
and the bare butt showing?"

Pretty lame, I know, but I tried!

 

[Hobbit-GalRosie]

When Frodo looks into the mirror of Galadriel and sees the Eye of Sauron:

Then the pants began to sew, searching this way and that; and Frodo knew with certainty and horror that among the many things it sought he himself was one. But he also knew it could not dress him - not yet, not unless he willed it. The Ring that hung upon its chain about his legs grew heavy, heavier than a great pants, and his legs were dragged downwards...

 

[HobbitGirl]

Gandalf: I think you've had those pants quite long enough.

Bilbo: You want them for yourself!

Gandalf: BILBO BAGGINS! Do not take me for some cheap fashion consultant. I am not trying to pants you! I'm trying to help you. All your long years you've had bad fashion sense. Trust me as you once did. Let the 70's go.

 

[Hobbit-GalRosie]

Omigosh, this is too good. Um, how about "For the time will soon come when Hobbits will shape the pants of all."

Or alternatively "When pants will shape the fortunes of all."

LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[33Peregrin]

Hey HobbitGirl, what you said was great!! You know how in that part in the book Gandalf says "You shall see Gandalf the Grey uncloaked" ? You could say like "You shall see Gandalf the Grey unpantsed!" I know this is stupid, but I had to say it.

 

[Lasgalen]

From the movie:

Haldir: "The Dwarf farts so loud we could have shot him in the pants."

-Lasgalen

 

[HobbitGirl]

Originally posted by Hobbit-GalRosie
"When pants will shape the fortunes of all."

Ha ha ha! Great one!

Thank you 33Peregrin!

 

[Shadowfax]

P'raps this has been done before, but it's Bilbo's sayiong from the movie that Frodo recites to Sam in the cornfield:

"It's a dangerous business, Frodo, putting on your clothes. You step into your pants, and if you don't keep your seat, there's no knowing what might sweep them off."

 

[Lasgalen]

Has anyone mentioned Galadriels gift to Gimli?
3 pairs of her pants.

-Lasgalen