The Lay of the Children of Hurin

[Frandîr]

Opening a discussion place dedicated to this lay.

Having a hard time finding the rhythm and musicality of the verses.

However, it's a nice refresher on these epic tales.

What do you all think of it?

Update:

I feel the story is more fast paced...

 

[Elthir]

For me, I like alliterative verse in general (tried to write some one day, and it didn't go well, or easily) and I think it suits this story nicely.

and now to distract from the fact that I can't think of anything interesting to say

even the hunter Beleg - of the hidden people
whose father was the forest - and the fells his home

Yes. More please.

 

[Frandîr]

There rush and reed their rustling plumes,
And leaves like lances louted trembling.

I got the rhythm now...