Halloween Movies 🎃

[Ent]

napalm delivered by Clint Eastwood!

clearly the best of the best in napalm.

 

[Starbrow]

We must be cautious lest Tolkien Fandom determine these presented Tolkien with the inspiration for Ungoliant.
To the best of Ent's knowledge, even the earliest of the movies featuring or about a giant spider (1953 and 1955 respectively) post-date Tolkien's writing of Ungoliant into sub-creation (1914, in the early poem The Voyage of Earendel.)

This one need not go to The Great Halls of Speculation.

I'm ready to watch Ungoliant vs. Tarantula now.

 

[Erestor Arcamen]

Oh NOW Ent feels really old. Forgetting the name of the spider movie he watched on Saturday, he googled "Old Spider Movies."
He was presented with "Spiders" and "Big A.. Spider" from 2013, "Arachnid" from 2001, "Ice Spiders" from 2007, and "Lavalantula" and "2 Lava 2 Lantula" from 2015 and 2016 respectively.

These are OLD???

But eventually the one watched was found. The impressive 1975 flick The Giant Spider Invasion.
No one can forget THIS spider, whose legs never quite touch the ground, yet it moves along at QUITE a respectable pace..!! (Or at least - the filmography makes it appear to do so. In some scenes it's quite apparent it can hardly move at all.)

View attachment 45340

Unfortunately, the Entwife needed substantial sleep-time this weekend just past, so a number of oldies found their way to the unsuspecting screen. (It complained loudly - then drank a nice English Breakfast tea to pacify itself. Ent was surprised, but @Klaatu may have heard of such things.)

Impressive to describe that movie is certainly an opinion…also not sure of the model but the make for the spider was a VW. 🤓

 

[Ent]

Impressive to describe that movie is certainly an opinion…also not sure of the model but the make for the spider was a VW.

Indeed.
1. Ent is full of opinions. And "Impressive" can mean many things in such an application. 😁
2. In the movie, the giant spiders were created using a Volkswagen Beetle covered in fur and operated by puppeteers from the inside for the larger scenes, and a crane-operated model for close-ups like when it was attacking the house.

Observing the differences between the two large spiders makes one wonder - was there more than just 1 giant spider intended for the film? Or was their intent for there to be just one 'really big' one? Ent suspects there are proponents on both sides of the argument. Were it a Tolkien topic, Ent would thwack it to @Klaatu for the Great Halls.

 

[Klaatu]

Obviously, Bill Rebane’s Giant Spider Invasion is not merely a film, dear @Ent and associates—it is archival footage smuggled from the planet K’zarth Prime, circa the Third Molt of the Arachnarch Epoch. The so-called “Volkswagen Beetle spider” was, in truth, a bio-engineered transport prototype meant to scuttle across the acid plains while emitting those haunting Midwestern sounds of terror (which, coincidentally, are indistinguishable from Wisconsinites yelling “Jeepers!”).

When the cosmic veil thinned in 1975, Rebane’s signal reached Earth’s primitive television receivers, and humankind, thinking it was cinema, laughed, cried, and baked blueberry muffins. Meanwhile, entire villages on K’zarth were being cocooned in polyester and disbelief. Truly tragic, truly.

I therefore submit, for the record, that this “movie” be filed not in The Green Dragon nor even The Great Halls of Speculation, but in The Department of Interdimensional Nonfiction and Arachnid Studies, Sub-Basement 3, next to Plan 9 and The Day the Earth Misdelivered Pizza.

—Klaatu the Unreasonably Certified
Chief Curator of Collapsed Realities
Deputy Minister of Bug Spray & Bewilderment
Keeper of the 8-Legged Archives (as approved by EA, probably)

 

[Ent]

The Department of Interdimensional Nonfiction and Arachnid Studies, Sub-Basement 3, next to Plan 9 and The Day the Earth Misdelivered Pizza.

This seems a fitting place to Ent, for the ensconcing of such an impressive work.
(Please read the second clause of the above sentence with an ear attuned to the realm of the satirical.).

 

[Klaatu]

This seems a fitting place to Ent, for the ensconcing of such an impressive work.
(Please read the second clause of the above sentence with an ear attuned to the realm of the satirical.).

Indeed, Ent—though I’d argue it might also fit nicely in Sub-Basement 4, right between Attack of the Crab Monsters (1957) and The Brain That Wouldn’t Die (1962). That one’s technically cross-listed under “unlicensed neurosurgery” and “romantic comedies,” depending on which galaxy’s rating board you ask.

Though if we’re expanding the collection, I’d humbly propose we acquire The Giant Claw (1957)—a documentary, naturally, about the great cosmic turkey that once terrorized half the Orion Arm before being distracted by its own reflection in a wormhole.

—Klaatu the Mildly Unhinged
Former Assistant to the Temporal Janitor
Grand Poobah of the Seventh Snack Machine
Bearer of the Sacred VHS of Eä

 

[Ent]

it might also fit nicely in Sub-Basement 4, right between Attack of the Crab Monsters (1957) and The Brain That Wouldn’t Die (1962).

There are so many amongst which it would possibly be fitting, Ent would assume after much pondering.

That said, you are Steward and Curator, and as long as your registries are in order, it can always be found for another discussion - whether of fit, merits (or lack thereof), premise, or comparatives.

Meanwhile, Ent feels he is going to be a bit busy downloading numerous historical offerings of movie-lore. In time, Ent's collection will allow him to drop the ever-nauseous expense of television and internet connection, and live quite happily at reduced cost, as he finishes his churn into mulch.

 

[Klaatu]

There are so many amongst which it would possibly be fitting, Ent would assume after much pondering.

That said, you are Steward and Curator, and as long as your registries are in order, it can always be found for another discussion - whether of fit, merits (or lack thereof), premise, or comparatives.

Meanwhile, Ent feels he is going to be a bit busy downloading numerous historical offerings of movie-lore. In time, Ent's collection will allow him to drop the ever-nauseous expense of television and internet connection, and live quite happily at reduced cost, as he finishes his churn into mulch.

As ever, your administrative wisdom sprouts deep roots. I shall have my registries reviewed posthaste — though the archivist in Sub-Basement 4 has become sentient again (third time this month). He insists the true chronological placement of the film lies somewhere between Attack of the Crab Monsters and The Creeping Terror (1964), though he keeps punctuating his argument with a kazoo rendition of Yakety Sax, so the evidence remains… inconclusive.

As for your mulching, may I recommend pairing it with It Conquered the World (1956) or Zontar, the Thing from Venus (1966)—the cinematic equivalent of reheated cosmic leftovers served with a ladle of pure sincerity. This one's a real gem.
Imagine if you will: the film redone as a nature documentary. Sir David Attenborough, whispering reverently over grainy footage of a rubber alien puppet emerging from a cave in Canada pretending to be Venus—

“Here, in the dim light of the electrical substation, we encounter the male Zontar venusicus. Observe how it controls lesser species through crude radio waves, much as a beekeeper might gently whisper his Wi-Fi password to the hive.”

When your download queue is complete, I’ll see that a commemorative plaque is issued:
“Ent: Who Faced the Public Domain and Lived.”

Lord Klaatu,
Eighth Archivist of Sub-Basement 4
Custodian of the Great Reel Spool
Wielder of the Sacred Remote (of Unknown Origin)

 

[Ent]

Zontar

Indeed, Ent just noted Zontar yesterday, and could not recall ever indulging it.
Your 'imagining' will be brought alongside now as it is watched - perhaps for the first time. (Though it may take two viewings to overlay Sir Attenborough adequately.)

 

[Ent]

However, it could well be we have consumed enough of the space in this thread.
Possibly even resulting in an 'unfortunate event':

Or at least:

 

[Klaatu]

However, it could well be we have consumed enough of the space in this thread.
Possibly even resulting in an 'unfortunate event':
View attachment 45359

Or at least:
View attachment 45360

The dreaded “thread implosion.” I’ve seen it before. First comes a puff of metaphysical, cotton candy steam, then the comments begin to fold in on themselves like frightened hedgehogs while arguing over the proper thickness of holiday wrapping paper. Soon after, all punctuation becomes self-aware and flees the scene entirely (except for the Oxford comma, it stays 💚).

If this one detonates, I only hope the fallout mutates me into something like The Beast of Yucca Flats (1961)—at least he got screen time.

Klaatu
Acting Steward of the Great Halls (pending review after the last explosion)
Defender of Obscure Cinema (especially 16mm extraterrestrial documentaries)
Survivor of Thread Collapse 7-A, “The Day the Posts Stood Still”

 

[Ent]

at least he got screen time.

Yes indeed, he was a large part of the action.

 

[Squint-eyed Southerner]

My PBS station is reairing this tonight:

.
Is yours? 🎃

 

[Erestor Arcamen]

My PBS station is reairing this tonight:

.
Is yours? 🎃

No

Edit: nvm, yes

 

[Squint-eyed Southerner]

For those who'd prefer to forego the chills in favor of being in, um, "stitches", there's

 

[Fingon_Findekáno]

For those who'd prefer to forego the chills in favor of being in, um, "stitches", there's

I watched that a couple weeks ago on Svengoolie. Lots of hilarious moments throughout, and I appreciated their effort to recreate the classic black-and-white monster horror film look (though the acting and dialogue was clearly from a later decade; this was made in 1974, I believe). However, I had to turn it off towards the end because it included too much adult content for my taste. 😬

I prefer watching the real old classics from the 1930’s, such as Dracula, Frankenstein, Bride of Frankenstein, The Invisible Man, etc. Silent films are great too, with The Phantom of the Opera and Dr. Jekyll & Mr. Hyde.

Oh, and while not a movie, I love watching The Munsters!

 

[Ent]

This one will always have a special place in my heartwood.
It will be watched again this weekend.

Now... let me know if I'm wrong, but is there a certain resemblance
here to our own @Klaatu? Are we missing something?

 

[Squint-eyed Southerner]

It will be watched again this weekend.

If you've never seen it, I heartily recommend the Spanish language version, shot at night on the same sets. Superior in many ways to the English version.

The ladies are much sexier.

All that's missing is a lead with Lugosi's intensity. I believe it's included in most modern Dracula DVDs.

"Yo nunca bebo . . . vino."

 

[Erestor Arcamen]

This one is tonight’s feature for me