Continue This Totally Ridiculous Story...

[Valdarmyr]

But Bob distilled the salt out of the river of tears that he cried and opened the "RDW Pretzel Company." He used some of the money he earned to hire the best lawyer in New York to fight RDW's malpractice suit. And when they won...

 

[HLGStrider]

they celebrated by taking a trip into a nearby wormhole with Benjamin Sisco and Captain Janeway.

 

[Aulë]

But it wasn't long till they came to a blockage.
John Candy had been trying to get to Jamaica, but had become stuck.
"Please help me get out of this wormhole," pleaded John, "If you help me, I'll train you to be a "bob"-sled team!"

 

[Valdarmyr]

Suddenly, Mr. Scott, who was holding on for dear life to the top of Treebeard, yelled, "Captain, it was our anti-matter imbalance that created the wormhole in the first place. But I can guarantee ya' I can give ya' warp speed on that "Bob"-sled, laddie."

 

[Lossen Vana]

Kirk stood nearby with his lost in space stair on his face. Then her help up a mirror and fixed his hair.

We
Will
Never
Surrender
I'M
So
Damned
Good
Looking!

He shouted in his abnormally slow talk. Bob looked at him and took his phaser and set it to kill. Then he...

 

[Valdarmyr]

...paused a moment and started pacing slowly. Bob said, "Awwlllriiiighteee then, Mr. James TIBERIUS Kirk, the jig is up! I know why you've been talking so slowly all these years. It's just so you could steal screen time away from your fellow cast members! Well, we'll fix that. You see this Ring of Power? THIS oughta help ya talk faster!"

Kirk looked at the Ring and said, "You...offer...it...to...me...freely. I...cannot...deny...that...I...have...desired...this." Kirk reached out for the Ring. And then...

 

[HLGStrider]

The line dancing Tooks snatched the ring and made off with it. Soron and Sauron got together and took over the Nexus...

 

[Tar-Ancalime]

but nobody cared except the harison fords...

 

[Lossen Vana]

Kirk began to rip out his hair.

You
Have
Figured
Out
My
Plan
Now
I
Must
Kill
You

Then he gave the manly captain look. And set his phaser to kill. Then once the ring was stolen.

Beam
Me
Up
Scotty
I
May
break
a
Nail!

Then bob rolled his eyes and desided it would be safer with the borg. He joined and a mico chip was placed in his head making him forget the stolen ring.

 

[Valdarmyr]

And then Captains Kirk and Janeway, Mr. Scott, Benjamin Cisco, the Borg, Soron and Sauron, Harrison Ford, John Candy, Bob and RDW all joined the Line Dancing Tooks out on the dancefloor. They did the Two-Step, the Ten-Step, the Cotton-Eyed Joe, the Bus Stop, the Hustle, and for their big finale, they all donned harem pants and gave a rousing rendition of "You Can't Touch This."

 

[Lossen Vana]

Then bob went and canged his name to Jim. Liking it much better.

 

[Tar-Ancalime]

but since it was the name of this nice guy...he changed it to georce

 

[HLGStrider]

Then Bert looked at Ernie and said "I think he meant George... It was probably a typo."
and Ernie said to Burt,
"No a Georce is a tap dancing penguin in a powdered wig. Everybody knows that... Bob is obviously now Jim the Georce."

 

[Valdarmyr]

And so henceforth, and so for some little time to come, Bob would be known as Jim the Georce, and his fame grew far and wide. And so Jim the Georce danced his little tap-dancing penguin dance, and his dance was helped by the fact that his powdered wig itched something fierce. But at least he didn't have to wear a tux on stage, because, after all, he was a penguin. Then one night, right in the middle of his tap dance on stage in front of a standing-room-only crowd, Jim the Georce...that is to say, Bob...did his interpretation of a scene from "Chicago," but he couldn't decide whether he should play the part of Catherine Zeta-Jones or Renee Zellweger, and he got so confused that he shrieked, and in a blinding flash of light, Jim the Georce, which is to say Bob, started channeling Richard Gere.

 

[HLGStrider]

The Harrison Fords all went OOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHH AHHHHHHHHHHHH but everyone else wanted the dames and started singing a scene from South Pacific... Nothing like a Dame, while wearing costumes from Oklahoma.

 

[HobbitGirl]

Then RDW did a double take. "Wait...is my father a hobbit? I always pictured him with hairy feet when he was falling down that hole..."

 

[Valdarmyr]

Then during a costume change, Bob put on his red-checkered flannel shirt, and he came out singing, "I'm a lumberjack and I'm okay," and the "It's" man from Monty Python, who was in the crowd, looked strangely like Gandalf, who happened to be in the ticket booth, and since the place was sold out, he told the next couple in line, "YOU SHALL NOT PASS!"

 

[HLGStrider]

and then the couple whipped him and threw him off the bridge.

you broke the bridge!

 

[Valdarmyr]

Aragorn, Boromir and the rest of the Fellowship donned their Devo hats and did the Time Warp.

 

[HLGStrider]

and bang! They were back in the Shire with Bob, now Bob again, cooking JDW some hot cakes and grits. He was wearing BIB OVERALLS!