RP 🎲 O Fëanoriel Runyaril ar i Vérë o i Silmarilli (Of Fëanoriel and the Oath of the 💎Silmarils)

[Áramandë Amaniel]

I heave a soft sigh, eyeing Findekáno, but speaking no word.

 

[Maedhros_Nelyafinwë]

"Honestly, you don't," Maitimo says to Findekano, his voice gentle, yet with a firmness to his eyes. "I do not wish to be treated differently than everybody else. I've had quite enough of that."

Like Ancalirë, he then falls silent, his cheerful facade beginning to wear away somewhat.

"Of course I would not object, Father," says Fëanor. "Your wisdom has helped me greatly over the years, and I would love for Nelyafinwë to learn from you also."

 

[Elbereth Vala Varda]

Findekano immediately feels bad for having said anything, mostly due to the fact that he questioned his voice of words even before they escaped his lips. "I-I don't mean it like that, brother." He attempts to correct. "Of course you aren't any different. I'm sorry." He feels bad that he had made such a foolish mistake, and now thinks back to their previous conversation. It feels as though there is a disconnect between them, some wrong, and he wishes to right it. But he does not know what it is.

"Very well." Finwe smiles. "I shall speak with Nelyafinwe, then. But take heart, for I will not oppose your teachings. Only instill in him what I did in you, and look how far such truths have carried you."

Nerdanel eyes Feanor, knowing they will have to repent but dreading the moment. Yet also anticipating it, since everything feels forced and broken with those things not dealt with. She glances towards Maitimo, yet tries to avoid the sight of Findekano. She had seen the scar earlier, and it had made her heart wan.

 

[Maedhros_Nelyafinwë]

"It's all right," Maitimo says quickly, instantly feeling guilty himself for making Findekano feel guilty. But an awkward silence now hangs between them and neither of them seem to know what to say. He suspects this is because they haven't really talked about everything, not since that horrible night on the road, and so he hopes they will get a chance later.

"Contradict my teachings?" Fëanor almost looks pained. "Father, I have never taught my children anything that would contradict your teachings, or at least I've tried not to. And indeed, yours have guided me through all the hard decisions I've ever faced."

 

[Elbereth Vala Varda]

Findekano doesn't reply, which he hopes does not seem a crude thing to do. He just doesn't know what to say. He's apologized many times to Maitimo, more than he ever usually did, and nothing seemed to right whatever wrong had fallen between them. He glances at Ancalire, wondering if she knows. Maybe some things have been discussed in private amongst them. Of course, just looking at Maitimo's sister won't open any truth up, but Fingon hopes it will at least inspire his mind to see the right.

"Oh, I don't mean that..." Finwe chuckles a little. "We agree on all the fundamentals, my son, and nothing have you been teaching that would ever contradict my own words. I mean only that I will never inspire him to rebel against you, or to do anything that you would not have him do, for I would not have him do such things either." He gently lays his hand on Curufinwe's wrist, calming the situation with clear-headed expression.

 

[Maedhros_Nelyafinwë]

Findekano's silence only increases Maitimo's nerves, and he wonders if he has somehow angered his brother and dearest friend. That's the last thing he has ever wanted to do, and his mind anxiously turns over every word they've spoken to each other since their arrival, and he thinks back on their last meeting on the road too. Was it really Maitimo's insistence that he is weary of everyone's pity and attention that has offended Findekano so? That seems like an awfully small thing. No, there must be other things, unresolved things weighing on his heart having to do with that unfortunate incident, or perhaps tensions with his father... perhaps it is Maitimo's fault that there is tensions between them, and Findekano is angry about it!

He stares at his half-finished plate, his nerves having suddenly killed his appetite. If only this dinner would end quickly and he could talk to Findekano in private, and figure out what was really going on with his friend.

"Ah, of course," Fëanor says to Finwë, relaxing. "I know you would never do such. I trust you fully with my son."

 

[Elbereth Vala Varda]

Findekano watches worriedly at Maitimo, wondering if his silence has made his closest friend upset with him. Still, he can't think of a word to say. His mouth is dry with growing concern. What if something is wrong and he isn't there for him? Or maybe things haven't quite been resolved... He can't tell. He's sure he's done something wrong, but he has no idea what. And the one person he would talk to, that always understood, seemed blocked off from him. Both of them. That is, Maitimo and his father. He wonders if they all know something he doesn't, or if he made a mistake that was greater than any other. His heart feels heavy. Surely, this is his fault. But how can he make it right? How can he make things right when he has no idea where the wrong entered in?

Finwe smiles. "Good, very good... And also," His voice quiets to a whisper. "What is your plan for the cordial apologies after this?"

 

[Áramandë Amaniel]

I glance between Maitimo and Findekáno, narrowing my eyes in suspicion as I whisper firmly:

"What sort of unresolved tension is this? Brooding in silence certainly shall not help...though I seek not to go against either of ye."

 

[Maedhros_Nelyafinwë]

Maitimo blinks in shock at his sister's blunt words, but he realizes she's right-- sitting here in awkward silence isn't going to help anything.

"I'm not angry with you brother, and I hope you aren't with me," he whispers, with a sad smile. "After dinner, I hope we can talk openly about whatever it is that grieves you?"

But they are interrupted by Fëanor standing up and clearing his throat loudly, silencing everyone. He figures everyone is about done with their meal, and it's best to just get this over with as soon as possible.

"My kin of the House of Finwë," he says in a clear and resonant voice, "many troubles have befallen both our Houses as of late, though you do not need me to tell you this. The betrayal of four of my younger sons has had devastating impacts-- not just on Nelyafinwë, who was the obvious victim of their attacks, but on all of us, in some way or another. The conflict, the stress of it all, and the confusion, has taken its toll on all of us. And, in some of our cases, such as in my own case, it has caused us to make decisions which seemed right to us at the time, but were far from it. I, and a few others in my family, wish to own up to these misdeeds, and plead for the forgiveness of those who were hurt within the House of Nolofinwë."

He takes a deep breath, not at all looking forward to what he has to say next, but knowing it is his duty.

"Due to a deception from my sons, which they managed to execute from behind prison bars, the terrible misdeed of the shooting and poisoning of Nelyafinwë was attributed to Findekano, son of Nolofinwë. A bottle of poison was planted in his chambers, making it look as though he had some part in this plot, and my sons claimed it was he who influenced them towards the deed, and that he had ultimately betrayed Nelyafinwë. I... I should have known better than to believe this, since I knew full well that these four were treacherous. But nonetheless, I must have been desperate to take some of the blame off my own sons, and instead I unjustly placed it upon Findekano, my brother's son, who was entirely innocent and had never been anything but a faithful friend to my beloved eldest."

Here, he gazes deeply into Findekano's eyes, a gaze full of sorrow and regret. "I asked your father to have you imprisoned, young Findekano, and it was terribly unjust of me to do this. He complied with my wish, quite possibly because we all feared for the safety of Nelyafinwë. And yet I wish he had defied me, for I'm sure he believed in your innocence as well... I should have sought more deeply after the truth, and not taken the words of my traitorous sons without question. Please, my nephew, forgive me for the injustice I inflicted upon you and for the ways you suffered."

Maitimo watches this hopefully, grateful that Findekano is finally getting the apology which has been due to him so long. It can't undo the misdeed, but it is significant that Fëanaro would ever own up to his own wrongdoing.

 

[Áramandë Amaniel]

I am moved deeply by Fëanáro's genuine statements, and I give him a loving smile, though my eyes water with tears, but I successfully manage to hold them back.

Not at a time like this, I think to myself.​

 

[Elbereth Vala Varda]

Findekano gazes down, his eyes darting. "No." He mutters under his breath. "Why should I forgive?"

Fingolfin eyes him, his gaze intense and stern as he mouths silently. "Findekano-"

Fingon rises. "You do all of these things, utter all this evil in silence about my father and his House, raise your sword, against my father, which for your knowledge, I have not forgotten. Then you pin all of this against us, while we suffered endless charity towards you, even in the face of being treated as lesser than your servants. You force my father to have me thrown away, in my own House, and then you attempt to leave me to die."

His voice raises. "How prideful can you be?! Do you not see that the unspeakable horrors which you pin upon the evil conscience of your sons is the same fate that you have chosen for yourself? You say it was an accident, and yet what stops them from saying the same? Your House is deceitful! And you stay so righteously inclined, believing in your pridefulness that none of this is unforgivable-! Repentance is a sure thing, uncle, and yet reconciliation is NOT!"

"Findekano!" Fingolfin rises, his eyes intensely narrowed at his son. Enraged to see this utter defiance.

 

[Áramandë Amaniel]

But at hearing these words...no. My heart shatters, and I rise swiftly, exclaiming:

"Findekáno! Please, give us a chance! Have you not mercy upon us? The traitors have been justly imprisoned already, and we have done what we can! Can you not at least release us from these grievances of yours, and seek to reconcile with us? Surely, this cannot be the start of a bitter feud between these twain Houses, not now of all times!"

 

[Maedhros_Nelyafinwë]

Maitimo suddenly goes pale at seeing this passionate outburst from Findekano, and he jumps up swiftly alongside Ancalirë, and in his shock he reaches for her hand, as some tiny shred of comfort.

"Findekano..." he mumbles hoarsely, his heart pounding and his throat feeling dry. "Please, don't do this... we need there to be peace between our Houses, if you and I ever want to continue to spend time together..."

In a way, Findekano's reaction is almost angering him, too. Not that Findekano isn't justified in feeling the way he does, but Maitimo thinks about how he forgave Fëanor, back on the day he had gotten shot, and he was the one who had gotten stabbed, beaten and shot multiple times by his own brothers and then had Fëanaro blame him for it, and fail to protect him. That was much to forgive, and yet Maitimo had done it for the sake of peace within the household. So why can't Findekano do the same?

Meanwhile, Fëanor falls into a cold and stony silence, feeling that this young Elda is being insolent and ungracious. He does not feel that he is owed forgiveness, but to have his heartfelt apology received with such vitriol angers him deeply.

"Well, what more do you expect me to do?" he cries, his voice enraged. "If I could turn back time and revoke my misdeed, I would-- I have humbly sought your forgiveness, and now you speak to me this way? I will not stand for this!"

 

[Áramandë Amaniel]

But I glance towards Fëanor, and I cry out:

"Fëanáro! Not you also! Let not this escalate any further!"

Yet, even my own words sound feeble to my own ears.

 

[Elbereth Vala Varda]

Fingon's face pales a little at Maitimo's words. He can't face him right now. It seems everyone is against him. It's as he had suspected.
Findekano looks at his uncle challengingly, his voice bitter. "Do you not even see it? After what you have done--"

Fingolfin raises his hand, "That's quite enough, Findekano." He says sternly, silently boiling at his son's outburst. This was the one chance for peace, and his son ruined it, not alone, but in front of the entire family.

"No, father!" He responds. "It's not! Time after time, Feanaro abuses you, he takes advantage of you, of our whole House. Takes our aid and then dishonors our name in the shadows. Expecting blindly and aimlessly, that we will forgive him every time." He looks at Fingolfin. "And you would. Time after time, you would. Perhaps he ought to see some consequence! That you and our whole House are not an object which he can insult one day and apologize to the next, and who will treat him with love and compassion all through." He stammers. "What-what is to say that this is not just some facade, a faked act which will attempt to make him close again, so he can embrace you, only to twist the knife!"

The whole company is stunned, Finwe included. Yet no one shows as much anger and surprise as Fingolfin, his eyes still fixed on his son.

"How dare you say such things about our family." He says sternly. "That is enough."

 

[Áramandë Amaniel]

Utterly shocked by Findekáno's second outburst, I stagger back, almost falling if it were not for my hand reaching sideways to hold the back of the chair behind me.

No...why hath this been....what sort of bitterness and rivalry now is this? Shall no peace come forth? Shall all end in bitterness and lack of trust, and...no...it cannot be...​

 

[Maedhros_Nelyafinwë]

Fëanor, ignoring the pleas of his daughter, narrows his eyes and storms closer to Findekano.

"You speak of cruelty and hatred and insults, yet what else could possibly describe the very words coming out of your mouth? How can you be such a righteous judge of the things I have done that I felt were right, in dealing with this horrible betrayal and deadly fighting amongst my sons? I'd like to see how perfect and wise you would be if it were your own family, your own children, and it were up to you to solve the crisis? Would you not be wary and suspicious? You have no place to judge your elder and your superior, and I hope you are now satisfied with the knowledge that we were so close to peace between our Houses, and you ruined it, Findekano. Just wait and see if I ever let you see Nelyafinwë again!"

He whips around and storms out of the room, the doors slamming behind him.

Maitimo, trembling with shock, practically collapses into a chair. "Findekano," he whispers, half to himself, "This isn't like you..."

The weight of all this seems to crush his heart. Seeing Findekano had been the one thing he had looked forward to after coming home and recovering, and now it seems that has been taken away. As he had before, he feels utterly and devastatingly alone.

 

[Áramandë Amaniel]

Fëanáro's response, though rationally justified, is delivered with another burst of fiery passion that I find no words to express any of this.

So this is it...it is over...the feud hath begun...

My grip on the chair loosens as all this shock seems to overwhelm me, and I slip to the ground, unmoving.​

 

[Elbereth Vala Varda]

Findekano's heart sinks, his eyes welling up with tears. Fingolfin comes from behind him, seizing his wrist.

"How dare you do this, my son..." He mutters. "And after all our work."

Nerdanel comes to Feanoriel, holding her in her arms.

"My love..."

 

[Maedhros_Nelyafinwë]

Indis, having gone pale with horror as she watched all this take place, glances around at all the destruction and grips her husband's arm. "My love, what are we to do about this?" she whispers tearfully.

Maitimo glances in concern at Ancalirë's fallen form, but he is too numb to react to anything, and stares blankly at Fingolfin and Fingon, not daring to interrupt them or even look them in the eye. His mind is reeling with the reality that there may never be peace again between their two Houses, and thus he may not see Findekano again, except as enemies, perhaps.