RP 🎲 O Fëanoriel Runyaril ar i Vérë o i Silmarilli (Of Fëanoriel and the Oath of the 💎Silmarils)

[Elbereth Vala Varda]

Fingolfin looks at Fingon. "I am disappointed and frankly disgusted with you and this behavior." Fingon shudders a little at that. His father doesn't use words like that lightly. But before he has the chance to explain or justify or argue, Fingolfin forces him forward, giving his son a push as he grabs his forearm and wrist tightly. "Get going." He mutters, and Fingon moves as he is commanded to.

Nerdanel pulls Feanoriel back up into the chair, smiling as her daughter's eyes open. "Love, are you okay?" She whispers. As a mother, nothing else matters to her in this moment than her lovely daughter's safety. Everything else pales in the light of her child's safety.

Finwe looks to Indis, an apologetic smile. "I, I will go speak with Curufinwe. In the meantime, see that our grandchildren are well loved and cared for. I know it pains me to do, but I know Curufinwe and he would only want to speak with me."

Fingolfin gives an apologetic bow to Finwe. "I'm terribly sorry for my son's outburst," His eyes narrow and his teeth grit slightly mentioning Fingon. "He will be dealt with."

 

[Áramandë Amaniel]

I glance at Nerdanel.

"Ammë...I shall be well. 'Twas only too much for me to bear. Indeed, mayhap it be best if I were away from all this...I desire to seek the beauty of nature...the winds, the leaves, the beauty of the stars, once more, so that my heart and fëa may be soothed..."​

 

[Maedhros_Nelyafinwë]

Indis nods at her husband. "All right then, good luck, my love. I wish you peace and success with calming him."

She watches him leave, and then glances uneasily around the room. She would be able to soothe Anairë, Aredhel, Turgon and Argon easily enough, but the family of Fëanor, she isn't so sure, since she does not know them well and they are not of her blood. And what a mess-- it's far too much for anyone to have to handle on their own, but she must do her best to console her shocked and upset guests.

"I think we should all leave this room," she finally says, smiling kindly to the group. "I can take anyone who is willing to go with me for a walk in the gardens. The evening air is cool, and may be calming and refreshing."

Maitimo smiles at Ancalirë, relieved to see her awake. "If you go there, sister, I will go with you, for I feel similarly."

He needs something concrete and tangible to ground him; otherwise, his thoughts about all this may grow so despairing that he will become hopeless.

Meanwhile, Fëanaro is storming down the halls towards the exit, seething with rage and brooding in his humiliation.

 

[Áramandë Amaniel]

I nod at Maitimo, before I turn my gaze upon Indis. Not a hostile gaze, but rather inquisitive.

"Well, I suppose I shall go with you, Indis, and I believe Maitimo shall come too, if he so desires."

 

[Elbereth Vala Varda]

Maglor smiles a little, not out of enjoyment of the conflict, but out of his new thought. Maybe, now that Feanor's apology failed, he won't have to apologize and admit his fault in it all. What a relief.

Amrod comes beside Feanoriel, his hopes for the healing arts manifesting themselves. "Do you need something?" He mutters to her. "There is a particular blend of herbs, which when combined into a tea, will be a very fine comfort. It may ease your heart, and certainly will aid your fainting."

Fingolfin, now many paces down the hall, is glaring at his son with contempt, unwilling to speak until they are in a private room, but reluctant to give any other glance than one of disapproval.

Finwe, now comes up from behind Feanor, for he had run after him. "Curufinwe-- wait-!" He exclaims, his robes gathered in his arms as he approaches his son.

Nerdanel stands up, her face buried in her hands. This conflict was her greatest fear.

 

[Áramandë Amaniel]

I take Amrod's hand softly.

"If you believe it shall aid me, go ahead. I will accept it from you. After all, you are on our side, and have proved your loyalty."

I add with a gentle smile:

"I would not distrust you."

 

[Maedhros_Nelyafinwë]

Fëanor stops and turns towards Finwë, his wrathful gaze softening to reveal sorrow and hurt. "I hate to say that you have advised me ill, Father, but I have done exactly what you asked, and look how it turned out..."

His voice, though bitter, is not accusatory towards Finwë.

~~~

"Yes-- we will go with you," Maitimo says to Indis, who nods in approval. And he gives a grateful smile to Amrod for being so attentive to Ancalirë.

"Does anyone else wish to join us?" she asks, glancing at everyone else in the room.

"If it's all right, I should like to go off alone for a while, and think," Aredhel says quietly, greatly troubled by everything they have just seen.

 

[Áramandë Amaniel]

I glance uneasily at Aredhel, not knowing if such a conflict would dare to separate her from me also. Yet before she can respond, I turn back, remaining silent, putting these thoughts away for a while.​

 

[Elbereth Vala Varda]

Finwe rushes forward, his arms looping around Curufinwe. "I'm sorry, son.... I didn't think, I didn't know, that he would react this way." He loosens the embrace, resting his hand on Feanor's shoulder. "If it makes you feel any better, Nolofinwe has taken him out of the room and informed me that he will be dealt with appropriately. He also apologized for his son's outburst."

~~

Amrod nods. "Very well, I'll make it and bring it to you." He looks at Indis. "Where is your room for drying medicinal herbs?"

Maglor nods agreeingly. Anything to get away from Turgon. "I'll go." He says.

~~

Fingolfin arrives at the room and pulls the door shut, his eyes fixed on Fingon.

"What say you for your deeds!?" He exclaims. "In all my years I have not seen such wretched insolence from you, and for you to bring this upon us, so close to the edge of peace--" He gasps, shaking his head in dismay. "I'm ashamed of you."

Findekano doesn't even want to respond. It all happened so quickly. He didn't realize the mess he was making. He wanted justice, but not like this. And now, everyone was mad at him.

 

[Maedhros_Nelyafinwë]

Fëanor shakes his head, at a loss for words.

"Little good does that seem," he says after a long moment. "You know, I had sensed something off about Findekano back on the day when Nelyo was shot, and even then I had tried to speak with the boy and make peace with him, but he refused even then... I know he was not behind the plot, for the evidence proves otherwise, but I still think I was right not to trust him. I certainly will not let Nelyo see him again."

~~~

Indis blinks in surprise, but she tells Amrod, "One of our guards will take you there. It is in the lower level, near the wine cellar." And a guard arrives to take Amrod down there.

Turgon, Argon and Anairë decide to go off on their own and wait for Fingolfin and Fingon to be done speaking. But Aredhel is unable to sort out the conflicting mixture of feelings in her heart. On one hand, she entirely agrees with everything her brother said. On the other hand, she realizes that his poor timing and lack of diplomatic grace have broken the peace between the two families, and provoked the wrath of Fëanaro, so things could quickly get serious. She glances almost apologetically at Ancalirë, but quickly glances away and says nothing.

As they wait for everyone to disperse, Maitimo takes a few deep breaths, but his racing heart won't seem to slow down, and his hands tremble ever so slightly. So, that strange feeling he'd had about Findekano all along wasn't completely unfounded. Whatever was going on with him, it wasn't good, and it would likely result in the two of them not seeing each other again for a long, long time...

O Findekano, why couldn't you have just verbally accepted Fëanaro's apology, even if in your heart you didn't agree? he thinks dismally. That's what I did... why couldn't you have done this also?

 

[Elbereth Vala Varda]

Finwe nods. "Yes... I suppose it does mean very little. But still, you know that Findekano can hardly speak for his father's House. He is young, and consequently foolish, and must have just had a moment of anger rise out of nowhere." He closes his eyes, and then opens them. "I don't know if it's best to separate them. From what you've told me, Findekano has been comfort to your son, and after everything you've said, do you think losing Findekano could reignite your son's emotional pain?"

He held his hand out. "I know this is hard, Curufinwe. I have also seen pain and trial."

~~

"Thank you." Amrod says knowingly, a little surprised by Indis' kindness to him, given what his father had said about her in the past. With that, he gives a glance to Feanoriel, following the guard.

Maglor nods, although all of these things have startled him a little, and somehow he feels like this is wrong. Even though it means he won't have to apologize, it feels wrong. Like something is indeed awry. He turns to Nelyo, a sad well of memory in the core of his eye. "Did you know any more about this than I did?" He asks, trying to deduce information.

~~

Meanwhile, Fingolfin still gazes with anger at his son, and speaks many things. "What do you have to say? Speak- NOW!"

Findekano lifts his eyes a little, not meeting his father's condemnation. "Nothing, father..." He whispers. "I don't know what else to say."

"You don't know what else to say?!" Nolofinwe does not usually raise his voice, but that his heir and son would do this feels like a personal affront and utter humiliation. "Look what you've done! Look how you've ruined this all! You have brought unmerciful spite and contempt as an identifier of our noble House!"

 

[Maedhros_Nelyafinwë]

"This is true," Fëanor begrudgingly admits, in response to Finwë's point about Findekano not speaking on behalf of the entire House. His own troublesome sons don't at all speak for him, after all. "Fine, then. If Nolofinwë wishes to make this right with me and discipline Findekano accordingly, I would accept that."

His frown deepens, though, at Finwë's second point. "Just because they have been close in the past, it doesn't mean the friendship is healthy. I fear that to allow Nelyo to continue to see Findekano would worsen his emotional pain, not help it. There is too much volatility and instability in young Findekano, for now, at least."

~~~

Maitimo shakes his head despairingly. "No, nothing... I knew he was angry at our father, and this I well understand and do not blame him for, but at the same time, I did not know it was... this bad..."

Bitterness lurks at the back of his mind. Did he not endure something at least equally terrible from Fëanaro? Why must he always be the mature one, always putting his own interests aside for the sake of peace within his family? Sometimes it feels like nobody else bothers to learn this skill, and Maitimo is fed up with it. Even when he was nearly dying of poison he still had to help some of his family members sort out their emotional drama.

 

[Elbereth Vala Varda]

"Very good..." Finwe nods, glad that he has made some progress. Perhaps, if he can speak to Nolofinwe after this, the hearts of the two Houses can be met once again, and with Fingon under discipline, all would be well. For clarification however, he asks. "What discipline have you in mind? For I feel your brother would right any wrong with you, if he could."

At the second comment, he has to admit that Feanor is right. "Indeed, Curufinwe. I feel I see your heart true and I trust it well. I do not know Findekano well, and yet from this outburst, he is far from a loyal friend. Too flighty, too undecided, as many of the youth may be." He adds, "Perhaps for now you should separate them, and keep that friendship away, before it grows into a problem."

~~

Maglor muses. "Hm..." Amrod, who had been standing close but hadn't yet left the room completely, as the guard was now talking to another guard, listened. "I'm surprised." He blatantly and openly states. "I thought you two were close."

Was that rude? Maybe, probably... Regardless, maybe it's best to leave it. Nelyo never reacts badly.

 

[Maedhros_Nelyafinwë]

"I don't believe that is my place to determine. I'd rather see Nolofinwë use his own judgment and discipline his child for himself."

Fëanor's face grows grave and he adds quietly, almost under his breath, "I do not wish to get into the business of punishing other people's children. Not again... that much I do regret, bitterly so, despite all that has happened today..."

He relaxes a little once Finwë agrees with him. "Yes, for now, at least. If Findekano learns and matures from this, and I can see at some later point that he will not be a threat to Maitimo, I'll allow them a visit, but after all the things my son has endured... we can't be too careful."

~~~

"I thought we were too," Maitimo says bitterly. "But just once, Amrod, could you spare your remarks? I-- I can't take this anymore!"

He jumps up suddenly, and cries out, not to anybody in particular but just as a rant of sorts: "Must I constantly tiptoe around everyone's feelings, being careful not to offend, when I am not offered the same consideration in return? And why could Findekano not have forgiven? I managed to do it when I was dying! It's hard, but it can be done..."

Too late he realizes he's shocked the whole room into silence, and everyone is staring at him. Now he has disturbed the peace too, and an immense wave of guilt passes over him. "This was not right of me to say... forgive me..." he says, horrified, and turns and bolts out of the room.

He is vaguely aware of Fëanor and Finwë talking in the hall as he passes by, but he ignores them and heads straight out for the forest.

Finding a dead stump of a tree, he draws his sword and fiercely and repeatedly hacks at it. This will be terrible for the blade; this he well knows. And he loves that sword. So why is he doing this? But he can't bring himself to stop.

Eventually, he strikes such a heavy blow into the tree stump that his sword gets stuck in there, and he can't pull it out.

At that moment, everything seems to sink in. His friendship with Findekano may be severed, which seems too much to bear on top of the sorrows he already carries.

He collapses to the ground, his body racked with sobs.

 

[Elbereth Vala Varda]

"That seems best." Finwe adds. "I only asked because I know well that you frequently have strong opinions. I would never wish to do injustice to your passionate beliefs, and so I wanted to know if you had some particular thing in mind. Now that I know you do not, I can act with surety."

Finwe comforts Curufinwe. "It is not your fault, my son." He mutters. "Despite what that young Elda may say, you have made good choices. No one could make better, in your place, seeing that your son was almost lost and your head was reeling with the thoughts of ire and judgement. I do not condemn you for anything that you have done. It has all been justified and paid for."

~~

Amrod watches as Nelyo seems to burst with emotion, and immediately believes it to be his fault. Secretly, the belief that he is unworthy of love and forgiveness and will never be treated without a grudge, returns. 'He'll never forgive me.' He thinks to himself. 'I'll always be a traitor to him. I'll always be an enemy and a mistake.'

It pains his heart to think of that, and so he leaves immediately with the guard, hoping that some escape to the healing arts will save him from utter despair and allow him to cope with these thoughts.

Nerdanel turns to Indis, staring blankly. "What should I do?" At this point, she doesn't know. So much has happened, and so fast. She wants to escape it all and find herself back in the gardens tending plants and singing sweetly to her husband. Instead, she's here.

~~

Meanwhile, Findekano falls to his knees in front of his father, sobbing. "I didn't mean it to ruin it--" He is afraid to acknowledge and accept what his role was in all of this, but there doesn't seem to be a choice. "I didn't mean for any of this-- if I had just--" His face drops. "I'm sorry-!"

~~

As Nelyo storms by, Finwe turns to Feanor. "What is going on?"

 

[Áramandë Amaniel]

I turn to Amrod, noticing his sorrowful and bitter expression, and I give him an embrace.

"I know, it feels almost too much to bear. Such dissonance between these two Houses, such anger and unpredictable consequences...most seem to have left us..."

I pull away, gazing at him, tears threatening to fall, and I add in a broken whisper:

"...as though we had done something wrong..."

But soon, my voice begins to rise, augment in a swift crescendo:

"...and yet we had not; we did what we could, punished the traitors, you repented and proved your loyalty, most of these things have been resolved, and surely there was an opportunity for peace; and yet Findekáno had the utter nerve to insult our House, and more specifically, our Father, in front of everyone! Right back at him, why should I forgive him?! Why should I even attempt to seek reconciliation with one who had uttered such despicable words then?! There is no reason for me to do such, none at all! If he wanted to be the one to commence this bitter feud between these two Houses, so be it! I'll gladly follow on from that path and see what becomes of him! I'll see if he's forced to regret his choice! Let such a feud come to fruition if he so deeply wanted it, and if Fate has allowed it! Nauva i nauva, imi sáralë ar imi nyérë!"

My breath comes in sudden, trembling gasps, wracked with tears, and I fall to my knees, sobbing for such cruel fate that had sundered the House of Finwë upon this fateful day. Indeed, now I have had a part to play in this sunderance also with these words of mine, yet how was I to prevent it?

I could not.

Valar forgive me.
​

---

(Nauva i nauva, imi sáralë ar imi nyérë! - What shall be will be, in bitterness and in grief!)​

 

[Maedhros_Nelyafinwë]

Fëanor's heart is cheered slightly at the encouragement of Finwë. "Do you really, sincerely believe that, Father?" he asks, tentatively and hopefully. "I know I have made some wrong choices, but in all this I tried my best to bring justice and peace to the family... alas, how miserably I have failed!"

Even as he says this, Maitimo dashes by in a blur of red, and Fëanor blinks in surprise. What has gotten into him?

"I have no idea," he says to Finwë, "but it can't be anything good. Come, let us go after him."

So he and Finwë follow after Maitimo until they find him in the forest. And he doesn't even notice their presence at first, so deep is his grief and lamentation.

~~~

Indis glances around, distraught at the chaotic scene unfolding before her very eyes. The room is already becoming starkly divided: the Fëanorians huddled together on one side, and the Nolofinwians on the other. She does not know how to advise Nerdanel. On one hand, her eldest son fled the room in great distress, so perhaps she should go after him. At least the youngest has gone off with the guard, and will be supervised there. And meanwhile, her daughter also seems greatly distressed. Though Indis has always been wary of the Fëanorians, her heart goes out with compassion to Nerdanel, from one mother to another, because of the predicament she faces. But she remains stunned and silent.

Indis is not the only one, however, who is sympathetic to their situation. Aredhel, too, is watching this, even as her brothers and mother are anxiously muttering amongst themselves. Of course she is sympathetic to Findekano's side of things, even if she disapproves of his approach, but at the same time, her heart goes out to Ancalirë, who is like a sister to her, especially after the time she and Maitimo spent in their House.

So, Aredhel is the first to break away from her own family and slowly approach the Fëanorians. Even though Ancalirë is muttering about a feud that shall surely start up, Aredhel decides she wishes to do her part to stop such a thing from happening, and she lays a gentle hand on her friend's shoulder.

"Perhaps you should go to Maitimo," she says to Nerdanel. "I will stay beside your daughter."

 

[Áramandë Amaniel]

I give a sudden start as I feel a touch upon my shoulder. I quickly turn back, only to find one of the Nolofinwians behind me, Aredhel.

A Nolofinwian, and yet 'tis Aredhel. O, how these two seem to contradict each other! Could I truly go against her? A feud I had spoken of, and yet surely, I cannot make her a sworn enemy of mine, for I desire not to, despite all that had happened upon this day....

I glance up at her, wiping away my tears, but swiftly I turn away. I respond, though my voice sounds broken and fragile, not any greater than a mere whisper, almost.

"Aredhel....why? Why are you here...."​

 

[Elbereth Vala Varda]

"I do, indeed, son." Finwe lays a gentle hand on Feanor's shoulder. "All may claim you had failed, made a mistake, and on and on they condemn you and utter that you had better have handled it differently." He shakes his head. "Your words were right when you said that one cannot say that until they have lived it themself. I assure you, none would've handled such tragedy better, and many would have done the worse of it."

As they leave, Finwe comes beside Maitimo, his hand outstretched. "Nelyafinwe, is all at peace with you?"

He doubts that the answer is yes, but a positive approach has always seemed better to him than a negative one. It invites more openness, he deems.

~~

Amrod is now well down the stairs with the guard, bitterly choking back on his tears, his eyes red from holding them too long. He doesn't dare let it out. And so those tears, those hot, angry, silent tears remain in the wells of his eyes, stinging. Angry not at any but himself, once again having those dark thoughts enter in. 'What makes me any different than Amras?' He thinks to himself. 'I'm a criminal. A sinner. I'm doomed to unmerciful light.'

~~

Fingolfin stares down at Fingon. "You're sorry?"

Findekano sputters for words. "Y-yes! I'm sorry that I've ruined this! I'm sorry that I've killed the peace you wanted! I'm sorry for everything! I didn't mean it-! Truly, I didn't! But judge as you wish, father. Throw me away for the fell deeds that I have done, if indeed you deem them so! Upon my word, I said nothing that was deceitful, nor uttered any cry of purposeful calamity-!"

~~

Nerdanel nods. "Yes, yes.... perhaps that's best." She takes Aredhel's hand, kissing it. "Thank you, dear. You shall make a very fine mother one day..."
And with that, she slowly steps aside, walking away and towards the door, hoping to seek her son.

 

[Maedhros_Nelyafinwë]

"Well... thank you, Father," Fëanor says, his heart moved by such words of praise. "You always have a way of bringing hope to my heart and making me think more clearly."

As they approach Maitimo and Finwë speaks to him, he quickly glances up, his eyes wide and startled at first, but he relaxes a little once he realizes it's his father and Finwë.

"No," he says tearfully. "Everything seems dark and hopeless. Seeing Findekano was... the one thing I had looked forward to while I was recovering... and it all seems ruined now. What have I to look forward to in the future?" He glances up at Fëanor in anguish. "You probably won't let me see him again, will you? And yet, I can't say I fault you much for that..."

Fëanor is silent, and he walks over to the tree stump where Maitimo's sword is firmly lodged inside. It takes him a fair amount of effort, but he manages to withdraw it and return it to him. Maitimo has been getting physically stronger, even than he was before he was injured, without a doubt.

"I will take this to the forge and repair the blade upon our arrival home," he says gently. "Do not worry about it." There have been many times where Fëanor has dealt with his own sorrow and anger by hammering the daylights out of some piece of metal, almost completely destroying it, or even destroying some creation of his, so he can't fault Maitimo for reacting this way.

~~~

Aredhel smiles at Nerdanel as she leaves, and turns back to Ancalirë. "You are my friend, my sister, and I'm not going to let some stupid argument between my brother and your father ruin it," she says with just a trace of mirth, and half a smile.