What are you writing about now?

[Ent]

I've found I have a much, much bigger vocabulary than it does.

I've not found Grammarly all that useful, either. It is, as you say, useful for some things. But its target user group isn't really the creative writing group... it's geared more to the average writer in business, school, journalism etc. (Though I DO wish many 'journalists' would use it... they'd put together better sentences with fewer flaws and more sense to them.)

The checker in Word is even more limited... but again, useful for pointing out things worthy of a review.

Creative writers should beware of both to a degree, as they will 'flatten' the power and punch of your writing if they're taken literally in many cases.

 

[david_wendelken]

Ent, I absolutely agree! I toss over 60% of their recommendations as unsuitable.

 

[Ent]

Ent, I absolutely agree!

Don't tell anybody..!! Ruin my image.

 

[david_wendelken]

Middle-earth book status report:

The Secret History of the House of Finrod
Book 1 - Cold War in Gondor
Circa 3A 1944-2100, with occasional flashbacks as far back as the late 3A 1300s in Arthedain.
507 pages (includes 2 page-sized place-holders for illustrations)
188,699 words
About 20% near ready material, 40% rough drafts, 40% very raw notes.
Illustration pages will be chosen when the text nears completion.

Book 2 - House of Finrod in the War of the Ring
One calendar year, from 3A 3018 to 3019, centered on the war in Lórien.
457 pages (includes 77 page-sized place-holders for illustrations)
153,230 words.
Fully edited text.
Illustration pages will be finalized based on input from the artist.

Book 3 - A Long-Expected Meeting
A culmination of the major threads in the story, "a very long, long, long time after" the War of the Ring.
77 pages (includes 1 page-sized place-holder for an illustration)
23,854 words.
90% fully edited text.
Illustration pages will be chosen when the text nears completion.

 

[Ent]

Middle-earth book status report:

do we have preliminary titles for these gems?
(if you've mentioned them before I've missed it, sorry..!)

 

[david_wendelken]

do we have preliminary titles for these gems?
(if you've mentioned them before I've missed it, sorry..!)

I edited my post above to add that info and a bit more, just for you!

 

[david_wendelken]

I have good news.

I pulled a section out of the unorganized bits at the back of the book one file and turned it into a proper entry in the appendices.

Much more important, I had a tale in book 1 in the unorganized bits at the back the file. It was originally written (decades ago!) in RPG game module style and I was converting it to a story format with an intent to move it into a proper chapter.

I was halfway through that conversion when I realized I had just written the last line of the last chapter of Book One with its narrator's equivalent of, "Well, I'm back."

I'll move the rest of the tale, which is interesting but is not essential to the main story, to the appendices in that style of presentation.

And I'm up to 517 pages from 507.

 

[Fingon_Findekáno]

@david_wendelken, are you intending for these books to be formally published?

 

[david_wendelken]

@david_wendelken, are you intending for these books to be formally published?

I will be publishing a limited Art Edition of about 25 copies each, for friends and family with hand-printed illustrations and enameled copper book covers. I suspect most of them will be used as very decorative paperweights. Maybe a couple will actually get read.

The copyrights on the LOTR, Hobbit and Silmarillion expire in half the world in about 4-5 years. Sadly, not the half that has money. (It's another 24-5 years for the rest of the world.) If I can't get a licensing arrangement by the (5 year) copyright expiration date, I'll do a Kickstarter limited to the countries I can sell them in without violating copyright. If it does well, maybe that will motivate the other parties to cut a deal.

It's going to take a good 4-5 years to finish the books, give them a through going-over for consistency, get the illustrations done, and make all the enameled covers and prints.

I may send a few Art Edition copies to various entertainment-related professionals, either because they might be motivated to help negotiate film rights or just because they are so very talented and adorable, like Cate Blanchett and Liv Tyler. Like the lottery advert campaign used to say, "Hey, you never know!"

If none of that works out, I expect I'll release them electronically for free.

 

[david_wendelken]

A bit of advice from you all. I'm pulling out three tales from my books to turn into story-sized booklets as Christmas gifts for my grandchildren.

I've done up 4 different cover concepts for the first one. They are a mish-mash of ready-to-go artwork just for me to get the design concept and basic layout down. I'll draw my own versions of the cover art once I settle on a design. (I'm too slow at drawing, these are quick and dirty prototypes.)

One of the covers has some elvish script on it, ignore the exact letters because I'm not yet sure of the elvish translation yet, much less the actual letters to use. Again, I'm going for the design concept first, then I'll get the details right if needed.

The capital letters will remain red, but in the actual print they will be a darker, deeper red.

Elements of the design are bees on a honeycomb, a couple of Dúnedain coins in the comb, and the badge of the current Harpist of Lorien.

Which one do you like best? And why? Suggestions for improvement?

Oh, and a friend pointed out that honey bees only have 1 pair of wings...

 

[Fingon_Findekáno]

What a wonderful idea, pulling a few of your stories together as Christmas gifts for your grandchildren! I’m sure they will love them, being such a personal and well-crafted gift from you, their grandfather. 😊

As for asking for our opinions, after spending time flipping through your designs and coming back to them with fresh eyes, I think personally like the first design best, with the title slanting from upper left to lower right, and the Dúnedain coins on the bottom left. It’s aesthetically pleasing to the eye and reads more intuitively. It also seems more balanced with the content, with the angle of lines and where your attention is drawn.

The second one took more than a few moments to initially process the title going upwards, and for the third one, while it looks just like the first design but with the bee image flipped, it gives the appearance of more blank space open on the top, simply because of how things are laid out. The fourth design is nice, though right now it gives the appearance of being perhaps a little crowded at the top with the addition of the Elvish script below the title.

Perhaps things will look different to me upon another viewing at a later time, but these are my initial thoughts. Great job with your designs and the amount of work and creativity you’ve put into your books so far!

 

[Server Room Gremlin]

A bit of advice from you all. I'm pulling out three tales from my books to turn into story-sized booklets as Christmas gifts for my grandchildren.

I've done up 4 different cover concepts for the first one. They are a mish-mash of ready-to-go artwork just for me to get the design concept and basic layout down. I'll draw my own versions of the cover art once I settle on a design. (I'm too slow at drawing, these are quick and dirty prototypes.)

One of the covers has some elvish script on it, ignore the exact letters because I'm not yet sure of the elvish translation yet, much less the actual letters to use. Again, I'm going for the design concept first, then I'll get the details right if needed.

The capital letters will remain red, but in the actual print they will be a darker, deeper red.

Elements of the design are bees on a honeycomb, a couple of Dúnedain coins in the comb, and the badge of the current Harpist of Lorien.

Which one do you like best? And why? Suggestions for improvement?

Oh, and a friend pointed out that honey bees only have 1 pair of wings...

I like the first design and the fourth one. The first one looks very neat and everything fits together. The fourth one looks intriguing with the use of elvish script, and I think it might spark curiosity.

 

[david_wendelken]

I have good news.
...

Much more important, I had a tale in book 1 in the unorganized bits at the back the file. It was originally written (decades ago!) in RPG game module style and I was converting it to a story format with an intent to move it into a proper chapter.

I was halfway through that conversion when I realized I had just written the last line of the last chapter of Book One with its narrator's equivalent of, "Well, I'm back."

I'll move the rest of the tale, which is interesting but is not essential to the main story, to the appendices in that style of presentation.

I finished the conversion and, whilst polishing a previously written chapter, I realized there was a gap between two stories that needed more exposition, so another chapter written! And this last one was out of whole cloth!

Three chapters written in less than a week! Woot! Page count is down to 512 from 517 because the story format takes much less space and detail than an RPG adventure module.

 

[david_wendelken]

I finished the conversion and, whilst polishing a previously written chapter, I realized there was a gap between two stories that needed more exposition, so another chapter written! And this last one was out of whole cloth!

Three chapters written in less than a week! Woot! Page count is down to 512 from 517 because the story format takes much less space and detail than an RPG adventure module.

I forgot to mention the riddle!

“What is a gift unasked for and unwanted, a gift that leaves its giver’s hands but not their heart, a gift that is the heaviest burden any shall ever carry?” She rested her face against her pony’s shoulder and closed her eyes and stood there, eyes closed. “Rather would I charge the host of The Morgoth alone than carry this burden, but honour and friendship amongst comrades in battle demand it, and it is mine to shoulder.”

 

[Ent]

You make wonderful progress..! Keep up the encouragements and progress reports.
The Riddle is very nice..!

 

[david_wendelken]

You make wonderful progress..! Keep up the encouragements and progress reports.
The Riddle is very nice..!

Improved version after some very kind and helpful advice from @Ent :

“What is a gift unasked for and never wanted; a gift leaving its giver’s hands but not their heart; a gift being the heaviest burden any shall ever carry?” She rested her face against her pony’s shoulder, closed her eyes and stood there. “Rather would I charge the host of The Morgoth alone than carry this burden, but honour and friendship amongst comrades in battle demand it, and it is mine to shoulder.”

 

[Ent]

As David has seen fit to post it, thinking they were indeed 'improvements', I'd like to just quickly post my 'reasonings why'....

I think seeing 'why' is sometimes useful in helping writers determine not only how they fit better here, but may apply to other situations as well.

Changes were done to the first two sentences.
As originally written,
“What is a gift unasked for and unwanted, a gift that leaves its giver’s hands but not their heart, a gift that is the heaviest burden any shall ever carry?” She rested her face against her pony’s shoulder and closed her eyes and stood there, eyes closed.

"that leaves" of course uses my favorite object of dread, 'that'. It cites a state of motion, but in a somewhat static way.
The adverb form 'leaving' both eliminates 'that,' and uses a little more powerful, active form of motion, giving a slightly stronger impresson/picture of 'motion' to the reader.

Same with "that is". "That is" is a static statement of 'being". of 'exists as'. the gift 'exists as' the heaviest burden... again in a more active motion kind of way.
Thus, the suggestion of using "being" the heaviest burden, 'being' also eliminating 'that' and incorporating a slightly more 'active' motion perspective.

In addtion, when David changed it, HE himself picked the subtly better, smoother "and never wanted" rather than using 'and unwanted'.. simply flows better. Also more 'exclusive' and 'powerful, as it indicates not just a momentarily situational 'unwanted' but a 'never.'

Then, I suggested the semi-colons after 'wanted' and 'heart'. They are 'stronger' than commas, better than periods. There's nothing wrong with the commas OR the periods.. but the semi-colon provides a better 'separation' without being the 'total disconnect' a period sometimes intrudes.

Since it all refers to the same original 'gift', semi-colons are just a bit more powerful into the equation of the first sentence, (and the riddle itself).

All in all, the power of that first sentence is, in my opinion, substantially increased. And he must think so too, as he adopted it...

Then the 'eyes closed' in the 2nd sentence was just because it 'duplicated' what was already said, not really 'adding' anything extra to the picture, and would be assumed by the reader.

Food for thought and application if/as/whenever it may fit your circumstances.
Again, always keep the receipt and impact on the reading audience in mind.

ADDED NOTE: (I may have mentioned it before)

... "and" and the comma are not always interchangeable.

'and' can be a very static conjunction, combining but leaving things laying a bit flat a bit, where a comma can add power.

Example: the baby was pouting and crying and raising a fuss constantly.
vs. ............ the baby was pouting, crying, raising a fuss constantly.
vs. ........... the baby was pouting; crying; raising a fuss constantly.

note the differences in flow and power of the 3 presentations of the same thing. the author's delight is in choosing which one fits not only the individual sentence, but the entire scene trying to be set. Sometimes you want the lesser. Sometimes the greater.

You are the artist; craftsman; painter working to bring the picture home. Make it the one you really want to achieve.

 

[Maedhros_Nelyafinwë]

I wrote 700 words in my book today! That's not a lot by my standards; at the height of my power I used to write 2,000+ words every day. But it was an important 700 words because it covered a difficult transition I've been stuck on for a while. I had to wrap up the army vs army conflict of the climactic battle and transition it to the point where my villain unleashes his magical creatures to wreak destruction. My mind is much more naturally inclined towards interpersonal conflicts, romance, and politics than it is towards battles, so this climax has been really difficult for me.

 

[david_wendelken]

But it was an important 700 words because it covered a difficult transition I've been stuck on for a while.

That's great!

 

[Tyelkormo the Fair]

I wrote 700 words in my book today! That's not a lot by my standards; at the height of my power I used to write 2,000+ words every day. But it was an important 700 words because it covered a difficulties transition I've been stuck on for a while. I had to wrap up the army vs army conflict of the climactic battle and transition it to the point where my villain unleashes his magical creatures to wreak destruction. My mind is much more naturally inclined towards interpersonal conflicts, romance, and politics than it is towards battles, so this climax has been really difficult for me.

Good job Timo!