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Peter Jackson Produced the Dungeons & 🐲Dragons Movie

Gloranthan

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Dec 4, 2022
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I have been a fantasy nerd since I was five years old, and Dungeons & Dragons (the old kind, where you die and suck it up like a man) is the catalyst for that. Robert E. Howard came along for me in my teens and, between that and Nietzsche, I've never stopped being interested in ubermensch with swords and magic who go around being irresponsible lunatics and conquering nations.

I saw the Peter Jackson films when they first came out (shortly after seeing the awful D&D film) and I said, 'that's what the Dungeons & Dragons movie should have been."
Looking back, after reading a great deal of Tolkien and the Fantasy Masterworks library, I still hold that view. I've watched the extended edition of all the films, at once, in a row, and I liked it. I didn't care for the movies they allegedly based on the Hobbit nearly as much, but I did enjoy the LotR films. But, other than the overall plot, they really did not capture the tone of the Middle-earth mythology (dark ages/ancient, rather than twee high medieval, in completely empty lands with nothing but prop CG cities). But they do feel a lot like D&D. You've got the Ranger, who is a ridiculous class with spells, swords, armor (basically, a human Elf, in D&D terms), you have a wizard, who casts one spell that is amazing but is utterly useless for the rest of the adventure, you've got a pretty-boy elf who is inexplicably superior to everyone and able to use any weapon he feels like and still do backflips in armor, and you've got a variety of fighters brought along as henchmen who end up dying because, well, that's why we brought you along.

The enemy is a ludicruous flaming eyeball, just like the symbol of Iuz from Greyhawk (Greyhawk ripped off the Eye on the orcs from LotR, then PJ took it literally) and all he does is brood offscreen and generate weather and random encounters with his mentally deficient legions. Who are slaughtered like cattle any time they run in the PCs, because they're orcs, and the powergamer elf, dwarf fighter and human ranger have an amazing THAC0.

Halflings have a level cap, so they're basically useless in high level adventures, but they have a great save against magic, so you let them carry your junk, sneak around, and pawn off cursed items on them.

And Aragorn's response to the Mouth of Sauron is entirely appropriate. As soon as you seen an enemy magic-user you kill him, forget parleying.
 
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I want to go see the Dungeons & Dragons movie, it looks incredibly fun. I had no idea that Peter Jackson was directing it, so bonus points I suppose.

I only recently began to delve into some D&D (Actual play podcasts, one campaign two summers ago). The history of the game itself is fascinating and looking at the old rule books of the classic and Advanced versions definitely shows a lot of pull from the LOTR. I didn't realize the two were so closely linked with each other for a long time. I would love to play some old school D&D myself or even make a campaign with the old rules. The 5E game I played was so complicated.

Have you seen the Lord of the Rings but its D&D videos by XP to level 3? Those are a fun take on what it might have been like if LOTR was just a D&D campaign.
 
Peter Jackson isn’t producing or directing Honour Among Thieves, the movie that came out yesterday.
 

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