The other joke and meme thread

[Erestor Arcamen]

Use this thread for jokes and memes that do NOT relate to Tolkien.

Keep things appropriate or we'll have to sick Grond on you

 

[Server Room Gremlin]

 

[Squint-eyed Southerner]

 

[Fingon_Findekáno]

 

[Deimos]

1) Don't believe I have
2) Prussia went out of business 77 years ago
3) Don't know about your ladders, but ours are designed for single occupancy 😬

1) I don't get the Prussia reference
2) I'm guessing you are unfamiliar with the "how many <whatever> does it take to change a light bulb?" joke.
Not surprised if that is true....some jokes do not work in other cultures.
You may get this one:
Q: How many psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Only one, but the light bulb has to want to change.

 

[Vorondil]

 

[Deimos]

View attachment 35608

Let me tell you, this is exactly true...very, very true.

 

[Olorgando]

1) I don't get the Prussia reference
2) I'm guessing you are unfamiliar with the "how many <whatever> does it take to change a light bulb?" joke.

1) The Prussians were "known", or infamous, for being efficient and humorless within Germany, with their bureaucracy and militarism. But that too was too sweeping a statement, certain classes in Prussia may have been so. Prussia was declared "extinct" by the allied high command in 1947.
2) No, I'm quite familiar with (ceiling) light bulb jokes, both in German and English, and about a wide spectrum of nationalities (I just don't remember many of them).
Here's one that's universally applicable:
How many megalomaniacs does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one, holding the light bulb while the world revolves around him.

 

[Erestor Arcamen]

 

[Squint-eyed Southerner]

a wide spectrum of nationalities

I've got a regional one:
Q: How many Virginians does it take to change a light bulb?

A: Three. One to change the bulb, and two to talk about how much better the old one was.

 

[Deimos]

I've got a regional one:
Q: How many Virginians does it take to change a light bulb?

A: Three. One to change the bulb, and two to talk about how much better the old one was.

HA! I first heard that applied to Episcopalians.

 

[Olorgando]

Just remembered another one but I've forgotten who was being made fun of (some intra-German feud, is my guess):

How many {somebodies} does it take to change a light bulb?
Seven - one to hold the light bulb and six to turn the ladder he's standing on.

 

[Maedhros_Nelyafinwë]

Actual picture of me:

 

[grendel]

How many Tolkien Forum users does it take to screw in a light bulb?

1000... one to change the bulb and 999 to change the same friggin' bulb without checking to see if it's already been changed...

 

[Squint-eyed Southerner]

 

[Deimos]

Just remembered another one but I've forgotten who was being made fun of (some intra-German feud, is my guess):

How many {somebodies} does it take to change a light bulb?
Seven - one to hold the light bulb and six to turn the ladder he's standing on.

I've heard that with a variety of pairings-- usually the immigrant offspring [in the US] of one European ethnic group commenting about another ethnic group.
(i.e. basically a macro version of European countries of your micro version within Germany)

 

[d4rk3lf]

How many Tolkien Forum users does it take to screw in a light bulb?

1000... one to change the bulb and 999 to change the same friggin' bulb without checking to see if it's already been changed...

That's ok...
But can you answer if Balrogs have wings or not?

 

[Glorfindel Goldtress]

But can you answer if Balrogs have wings or not?

I was there, Gandalf. 3,000+ years ago...

 

[Deimos]

 

[Deimos]

 

[Squint-eyed Southerner]